I see the reflection of light, bounce off the silver.
Holding it in my grasp, clenching my fists tight.

I can't do it
I shouldn't do it

I hear the voice in my head scream louder.
I'm on the verge of tears, though my eyes are completely dry.

Please stay safe Sam. Please.
It will get better, I promise.

I'm now shaking, silver closer to the beige.
Their voice. Their voice is what is keeping me from my art.

You don't understand.
You don't deserve any of this.

The torture pulls at my soul, at my heart.
I throw the silver across the room.

Why am I like this?
I've actually lost my mind for moments at a time

Wrapping myself in a blanket,
Shivering until the starlight overcomes my mind.

*and puts it to rest.