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Nov 2016
Dear lover,

There will be nights that you won't understand, nights where I'll only want to go to sleep and find comfort in the silence of a bedroom.
There will be mornings where you'll leave the bed before I do, mornings where I might not even get out of bed at all.

I want you to know that I'm still me -
I'm still the girl that begs you to leave the house at one in the morning for an adventure. I'm still the girl that will get out of bed first so that you'll find breakfast waiting for you in the kitchen.

I'll still love you if you don't get it.
More pathetically, I'll still love you if you leave.

I like to think that someone who truly understands won't leave in the first place -
but maybe that's just me being naive.
Every person that I've ever loved has left in the end, so who's to say that you won't pack your bag and quietly shut the door behind yourself when you go?

If you do, I want you to know that I'm sorry. This is who I am and I will never change. I can't change.

It flows in my blood and makes a home out of my heart -
it's something that takes the shape of a little girl who cannot stop crying for her parents. A little girl who wants someone to hold her more than anything, but not just any person.
It's something called loneliness.

I'll still love you if you go,
but I just might love you more if you decide to stay.
naxiai
Written by
naxiai  23/F
(23/F)   
263
 
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