You crossed my mind again
a bitter taste formed on my tongue
like the coffee that has sat too long
I wish you were absent from my memories
but you stick like the gum under my desk
and seep under my mind's door like muddy water

I forget that bitter taste sometimes
when I think of you
It's like honeyed trash, sweet at first,
and then sour and gag inducing.
Your memory makes me ill.
Sick to my stomach
to my mind.

You'd think, after this time, you
would be less present
And yet, here you are in the palm of my hand
sticking your finger in my face
and giving me hell while I still flounder
to figure out who I am.

Bless you, *******, I hate you, I love you.
All words. Spoken. To. You.

I wish I could rip that memory from my mind
but I can't because you sunk your claws so deep
that my blood runs black from your toxic waste
I wish, I want, I can't, I won't.
All things. Spoken. To. You.