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Oct 2016
PJ
Maybe you're the reason I always love those who hurt me
Maybe you're the reason I always forgive
Maybe you're the reason I've been ****** since I was born
The reason why I became an adult as a kid

Let me explain to you what I mean by that
How I'll always be my father's daughter through and through
You see he unintentionally planted his ideals in me, and then they grew and grew

Its this lifestyle of doing things my own way
Doing whatever the **** I want
Do what I love and nothing else
And if I'm not happy then I'm at fault

When he left I had to deal with it
Take care of my brothers and myself
Cause my mother of four was busy with work and school cause his affair really ****** her up
She unconsciously sent me the same message, though it came in harsher words

I'm the only one that I can rely on
People will ******* over and hurt you
In some families blood means nothing
So you have to fight for you

But dad returned to show me the ropes and I relied on him again
He showed me how to sin like a real Christian
Deny God and love him still
He showed me the sweet dangers of drugs and alcohol
Of how mental illnesses will try to **** your soul

But he showed me some better things
Things that have stuck with me more
How to paint my feelings and draw my insecurities
How to take on the world and try new things
How words and music bring the most joy and sorrow
How to live in this **** and to always love the sinners the same as saints.

Now simple with kind words, my life lesson is the same
Live for yourself
Love others
And experience everything
Amanda Jean
Written by
Amanda Jean  DYT
(DYT)   
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