found myself falling asleep after 3 am
then you came and woke me up shortly at 5:41
shouting
i've never liked harsh good mornings
i can almost hear you say "stop oversleeping"
but how do i tell you "i barely slept"
how do i tell you "there are demons that keep me up at night"
and "they all had your face"
how do i tell you that

one time i dreamed of you walking on the beach
holding hands with someone else
i couldn't breathe when i woke up
the sound of me drowning in the sea of our tragedies
kept playing like a broken record
at the back of my head

i can't remember the last time i had to sleep at night
without having to worry about the next day
maybe it was before that evening-- you came home drunk
i read a text from your phone that said
"Take care. I love you." from a number that isn't mine

lately i've been staying up too long
long enough to let the lights from
my consciousness die out
just so i won't notice the demons that wear your face
play hide-and-seek beneath my lids
every time i close my eyes