I am always writing about heartbreak, loneliness, and sadness that some boy has dawned upon me.
But lately, I've been feeling like
I had broken my heart long before any boy had the chance to.

When I feel the loneliness peak from the crevices of my heart,
I can't seem to find an explanation as to why
Other than, I feel like utter **** and I can't blame anyone else.

I love myself.. at least I think I do.
I am confident in who I am.
Yet again, I chase the boys who I know will hurt me in the end and long for the ones that don't give me the time of day.
I cry for people that are not worth my tears and write about people who don't think twice about me.

Why do I keep hurting myself?
I keep breaking my own heart again and again.
At the end, all I have is me, myself, and I.
If I keep breaking my own heart, who will be there to tell me it's okay when I'm wrapped up in my blankets crying my eyes? (the kind of crying where you can't breathe and it's a constant battle of letting everything go and calming yourself down)

I need to love myself profoundly and fiercely before I let another boy in.
Because when he leaves, I can pick myself up because I know he is not worth it.
Because for once, I love MYSELF more than I love him.