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Mar 2016
Good listeners are selfish.
Probably
The most selfish people
You will ever meet.
All they do
Is sit back,
Absorbing everyone’s stories,
Experiences and insights
Whilst, in exchange
Giving back none of their own.
It is only sensible to assume they do this
Because they have none of their own.

They are leeches.
Parasites.
And
You can never resent them.
All you can do is look up to them
Or worse,
Become a pale imitation of them
For fear of one of them stealing your girlfriend
Whom you can bet is with one right now
Filling in the voids of his silence
With all her ideals.

They are the bloated sponges of our admiration
And they have become so
Without lifting a finger.

A truly humble person
Talks about themselves all the time.
They dish out perspective
As freely
And as inexhaustible
As a drinking fountain.
Even if what they say is inane, bland or offensive
They have still given you
A reason to feel better about yourself
And something
To ***** about
When they are gone.

I ask you now to please spare a thought
For the narcissistic *******.
He has lifted a countless number of awkward souls
From the depths of an awkward silence,
He has saved you from any obligation
To be intelligent or interesting
And he has turned the art
Of wooing the woman you love
Into the simple act
Of never speaking.

So,
Once again
Spare a thought for the narcissistic *******.
He gives you everything
And in return
Gets nothing.
Nassif Younes
Written by
Nassif Younes  Scotland
(Scotland)   
5.6k
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