Doctors and Clinical Psycologists diagnose Depression as:
A mood disorder causing a persistent feeling of sadness or lost of interest.
Sadness however is just a side affect of depression.
The real culprit is exhaustion.
Exhaustion that the world hasn't changed. Exhaustion that your career hasn't changed. Exhaustion that you are poor. Exhaustion that your family or other people around you havent changed. Exhaustion because you cant seem to fit in with them. Exhaustion you cant seem to change your appearance. Exhaustion because you cannot change your personality. Exhaustion because you are recognized for a fake smile.
Exhaustion because you are not recognized at all.
Exhaustion strikes because you are ultimately unable to change the mechanics in the grand machine that is your life.
You are stuck in a never ending loop. A cycle of what you feel is a wasted life.
A life you feel you are powerless to change because you are too exhausted to do so.
This is the true meaning of depression:
The desperate, crippling, aching, hurt you feel. The heavy signs you release at the end of the day. The anger that rips and shakes through your body. The screams and sobs you let fly deep into your pillow so nobody hears. The silent pool of tears that stream down your face at night. The ones that cling and stain your cheek.
All the emotions that stop when you finally sleep, when everything stops and you are taken by the dark void of a dreamland, when the exhaustion finally ends.
With a life like ours can you really blame the exhausted, For wanting to sleep forever?
Just felt like this needed to be said. I used to feel so exhausted when I was in my really bad stages of Depression. A lot of people dont understand the pain because it's in your mind. But it's as real as a broken arm or leg.