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Jun 2015
Loving you was hard.
You were an outcast; you loved what others wouldn't.
Even when you were small and I became real, you were hard to love.

You lit things on fire and you gave light to where there wasn't.
You had no light for me yet,
and you couldn't love me.

I watched you find company; you feel more than you should for others,
and so you fall.
Sometimes one of them picks you up, but you never saw me behind them.

You once gave your heart away, and I was happy for you.
Watching it slowly flattened to the grill and burnt to be undesirable...
that was hard.

Then one day, you found him.
He was perfect and I was jealous.
You gave him everything you had left; how I longed to be loved that way.

Remember when you lost family?
Now he's your family...
Where is my place in your heart?

Now you scream in the night while I stay awake watching you dream of a better life.
Your tears flow and you scream in my ear.
I scream back, but you gave me no voice.

I see the figures that stand around you inn the night when you sleep;
black and devoid of light, they watch you.
They reach out to you with rotting flesh;
the smell is so bad...

I scream for you to wake up to the light;
Your burdens are heavier than mine;
mine was only ever to love you.

Loving you was hard.
Maybe if I beat emotions in another's chest I wouldn't hurt so much.
I loved you so much!
I am you!
I've always been!
Why can't you love me?
Written by
SpazticOrange  Malaysia
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