I see your name on the side
Of my Facebook newsfeed,
Telling me that you’re online
For the fourth time in half an hour.
I won’t lie.
I click that bookmarked tab
As often as you do,
Just so I can see your name.
I miss the days when
There would always be a notification
Telling me that you were thinking
Of me at that moment.
It’s been more than a month
Since your little chat box
Popped up to say hi.

I deleted your number last Friday
Because I couldn’t bear
To see you in my phone
Under the nickname “Ex.”
But I would recognize it
If I saw it on the screen again.
I want to talk to you
But I won’t make the first move.
You ended us,
So I’m waiting for you
To contact me.
I think you might be
Waiting for me to text first.
You’ve tried to talk to me,
But you did it all wrong.
You always do that.

I was told that you let some emotion out
That first weekend alone.
It made me sad
To think of you with tears in your eyes,
But also relieved,
Because it meant that you did care
About me, after all.
Even just a little bit.
It doesn’t have to be like this.
You didn’t have to let go.
I was there for you,
Holding out my hand
When no one else would.
I’ll still be here,
If you want to come back.
But you won’t even text me first now.
So I will wait until I cannot wait anymore,
Until the urge to talk to you
Becomes so overwhelming
That I contact you first.
Because I always do.