I planned it all out
    Carefully manipulated
       Every tiny detail
           As if I thought
               For those few seconds
                   That I could script life
                        I was going to tell you
                           I had it all figured out
                             But when life happens It never happens the way you wish.
    Your laughter seemed off
        Your smiles struggled
            As if you were clinging
                To a past happiness
                     Or trying for us or you
                         To act like everything
                               Was fine
And so I knew that my seemingly
   Unimportant piece of news
       Would knock you from
            Your carefully placed
                Pedestals, and that I could
                    Not bear to see
                        So since I couldn't
                           Find the courage.
                               To tell you in person
                                   I wrote it in a poem
I had a relapse, it was only two days
But I felt so hollow, so empty
And everything seemed to hit me
Like a train that had been delayed
I realized how far apart we really are
We said that it wouldn't change us
But I know that isn't true
We will always be friends but things are different now. And just the other day. In the hall I met his eyes and all I wanted to do was turn to you and cry
But then I realized I have gone so far, that no longer can I turn to you and hug you, unless it's from afar. So I had a two day relapse, it's run its corse and gone, and even though it's over now, if you know what I mean, the long sleeves are on.