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I just wanna say that,
I really tried hard, maybe even harder
To compose myself again
I did so many things to distract me from the pain
I thought that I am already okay
I didn't expect that you really have mastered ways on how to break me
Every move you make,
Every step you take
Every words you say
Just you're mere existence
*breaks me
It's the things we love most that destroy us
It's cold.
Everything's distorted,
And I can't breathe.
I'm fighting,
Struggling to move,
Then it's freezing.
My eyes sting,
I gasp for breath,
But everything becomes crisp and clear.
The waterfall is pulling me in
As I drift around the pool of blue.
I'm moving closer and closer
Then I'm suddenly under.
It's all white and everything's moving so fast
I'm being crushed
And I'm so scared
I'm never going to escape
I can't breathe
I don't know what to do
Then it all stops.
I'm floating again.
Drifting along a cool cushion.
I can see,
I can breathe.
Everything's okay.
 Jan 2015 Peter Tanner
WickedHope
Do you see me,
right here in front of you?

I'm the girl who's not even 115 pounds
but wants to lose twenty.
I'm the girl wearing pale-pink lipstick Monday
and black by Saturday.
I'm the girl who hates how I look in my glasses
but hides behind the glass and frames.
I'm the girl constantly creating picassos on my arms
and books in my mind.
I'm the girl who is constantly daydreaming
because she never sleeps.

I'm waiting on you
Do you see me?
Titles are pointless it seems.
- - -
Stuck in my head:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4QS-mKQWOZI
If you wake up with red puffy eyes and messed up hair, a body that would not be considered "perfect" by society's ******* up standards, wearing scrunched and unflattering pajama pants and an old stained T-shirt for a band I don't even like with a sore throat and a pale face, oily skin and rough hands because it's getting cold and dry this time of year, and you sit at the table and have your tea with me in the morning, still quiet and barely awake, how you look then and there will be when I love you the very most, because that's when I know you see our relationship as something that doesn't rely on us always finding each other's outward appearance attractive. But, that is when I will find you the most attractive of any moment in time, when you wake up, and look like YOU.
one day, idk.
Who knows if I even WILL get married. I highly doubt anyone will want to marry me, but eh. whatever. It's nice to think about.
As you inhale
So do I
But not in the same way
You inhale to drown yourself in the feeling of love
It courses through your veins
And camps In your lungs
Engulfing your heart
And as you exhale  
Your release your love in a cloud of smoke
I hold my breath
Trying not to breath it in
Scared of the long lasting affect
Trying to protect my health
You inhale and exhale again
You step towards me
Expelling smoke from your mouth  
Your love in the air
I take a step back
The gassy odor stains my clothes
Seeps into my skin
Chopping my breathing as it chokes me
Your eager to take another inhale
To breath it in
I'm just afraid of the second hand smoke
You know, when I said I'd die for you,
I didn't realize you would be the one that would **** me.
The mighty storms that blow, but intervention you will stand
God’s true followers are under his command
The heavy rains that become a terrain
Yet with wisdom and understanding no need to complain
God’s word is the target of aim
The Lord follows us all in where and no one else can compare
Situation storms are made to force people to abide
But God sits high, and carry’s all above a meaning less stride
Struggles by and by
Yet it’s Heaven’s strength that keeps telling us to continue to try
However these same evildoers try to hide
But God knows where to put the tide
You have nowhere to run
God is faster than any firing gun
The Lord see’s and knows
He is his own show
Conflict doesn’t stand a chance
God’s praises in how you will advance
Yet the enemy wants to attack Joy in being a prance
But once again they don’t stand a chance
A storm is an ongoing test
But it is the Lord that says it best
“Through the storm don’t be alarmed, as I am the Lord God and will not harm”.
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