I sat along the lonely shore
Taking in the ocean waves
That hit against me slowly
Engulfing all of the fears I had carried with me.
I swam through the water
Fought through the waves that prevented me
From getting to the opposite shore.
I overcame the tsunamis
And survived the thunderstorms.
Through my journey, in the ocean of emptiness,
Just when the water was about to drown me
In its hidden cemetery..
I looked to the sun for the strength and vitality
That would keep my head above the water
*Even if my thoughts were swimming deep.

In the beginning*

Your butchering words,
Went through my head.

As a child who listens,
To every word you say.

Your constant sarcasm,
Your words which,
I thought were the truth.

Just to let you know, Dad
Those butchering words,
To me are now worthless.

For I know now,
It was only your sickness.

Looking at the ceiling
Thinking,
Just thinking..
What you're gonna say
What you're gonna wear
What you wanna share.

Some think it's easy
To drift away anytime,
Some think it's hard
To go away 'til next time,
Some pray all night
Friends, family, health and all,
Some just like to listen
To the silence throughout the hall.

It can get so quiet
You don't want to break it
You just want to feel it,
Within your mind
Within this art
Within your eyes
Within your heart.

It's hard for me
To just start sleeping
But then I just look
Right up at the ceiling.

No friendly gestures.
No fake smiles.
No hugs no kisses.
I cant be wowed.
No reason to run.
Your time will come.
Love hurts thats why they say knowledge is pain.
My pad and my pen are my best friend.
Don't look at the way I dress or the color of my skin.
Get to know me the person within.
Until then I will still win.
Because the pad and the pen will tell a story again.

No need for nonsense,
I’m taking the time to trust.
Safe and secure in his arms.
Sealing our perfect pinky promises with kisses,
Sharing secrets under silent stars,
Dancing until daybreak.
We find eternity in each other’s eyes.
Falling for my first “forever.”

The endless blue sky
No clouds in sight
How peaceful to be there at first light
Peacefully looking up
Not a sound
Not even a critter.

The yellow, orange leaves
The cool fall breeze
There’s nothing like sitting there on this gorgeous fall day.

I smell like coffee, bruises
and insomnia
for the night I spent weeks awake
in bed,
from 12:17 to 12:32
counting heartbeats instead of seconds
and listening to
the wind, howl me reasons
to step outside.

It yelled through the blinds
where the window
doesn't latch shut
and picked up the edge
of the goose feather
hollow
to remind me
that no one else was up.