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Ell 5d
I haven't been the same without you.
oh dearest, the feelings you gave me.
I was wanted by none other than you.
when did you ever let me down?
your scars felt like kisses on every open area you could find.
I will always love you. no matter the pain you cause me.
im so glad you've come back.
I want to kms :)
Ell 6d
I want to feel the breaking of my own skin. the resist of the blade on my upper thigh.
god, I am worthless.
the only thing that makes me feel as good as you do is the trickle of blood down my legs.
how quirky.
I can't even describe myself.
I am becoming my father. addiction will always be a top priority.

"I promise, I promise"
and to think, I would never break one.

I am everything I am trying to run away from.
Ell 6d
five months.
two.
one.
three days.
none.

I don't want to stay clean. the days add up and mean less than they used to.
it's hard to stomach the pain, it's been so long. I'd like to think of it as a reunion of childhood playmates.
Ell Aug 26
I love you
but I can't help but let it cross my mind.
the few days where I didn't know where you were made me much happier.
you're with him.
I can't help but let it cross my mind.
I know what you do.
you wrote me a song and sang it for him.
I love you but I can't sit here and let you **** me.
my emotions are worth more than you.
I am not the person you cause me to be.
what the **** is this ****
  Aug 21 Ell
Yenson
the poor racists are desperate
the fooled are waking up
the lies and sins revealed
the racists are squirming and frothing
hiding behind black people
crawling in failure, scrapping barrels
hiding in shame afraid as ever, living in white lies
the wi--ers in the woodpile are honking like pigs
  Aug 21 Ell
Bunny Rubinstein
I have kissed boys

Girls

People in between

But lately I have been kissing bottles

Their lips are colder than yours

But slowly I have realized that the pounding headache when I wake is less hurtful than the shattering in my chest

Yet as these toxins rush through my veins

I can't help but miss the tracing of your fingers along my skin

Miss the numbness of the world when you lie with me

But when I wake I remember that a headache is treated with an aspirin

While heartache

Well if you have a cure for Heartache let me know
Ell Aug 21
22
I cannot escape you.
everything wants me to be reminded of the dreaded number.
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