I wish I could go
back to the days
when prancing around naked
wasn't seen as a stripper's case,
a time when
depression was a difficult word
to simply speak and spell
not a condition from which I suffered,
when playing with Barbie
was a part of my daily routine,
and not to look like one
with a big **** but body so lean,
a period when
I could make myself
happy at the same time
with everybody else,
when the Sun seemed reachable
and stars twinkled in my eyes,
when truth was my only language
and I couldn't tell sugarcoated lies,
when the whole world
was mine alone
not merely confined to
the screen of my smart phone,
I wish I could go
back to being a kid
but I not know
how to time travel,
so I do unravel
back being kids-
by keeping an open mind
and closing my eyelids.

.
yo ur
to   u   ch
ign   i   tes
my  heart
set ting
m y
******>u l
on
f i
re
gi
vi
ng
aw
ay
yo
ur
pa
rt
ta
ki
ng
in
my
de
si
re

The "SHIP"

of our friendship

stands marred,

broken and scarred

are our hearts

that beat apart

and out of sync,

empty to the very brink.

Now that I think

with every blink,

we came with a date

of expiration in wait

because the very word

that defined our world

had an "END" to it

-fading friendship bit by bit.

PART 1

I will be on my knees
still never beg
to be yours
as I'll spread my legs.
Letting you tie
my wrists with ropes
doesn't mean submission
so don't up your hopes.
If I let you in
and you let me come
please stop mistaking
it for something beyond fun,
as you move
up and down, inside-out
marking my neck,
it's simple biology without a doubt.
And as you taste me
getting too close
somewhere no one's ever been
don't you dare think it's you I chose.
I don't care
for anything other than
these bursts of pleasure
where you're just another man.
Stay where you are
never cross these lines,
I am an attention *****
it's the thrill on which I thrive


PART 2

I sold my thoughts
for mere pennies,
prepared myself to be bought
by so many.
Craved attention
by typing stories of my dismay
sought appreciation
with vulnerability on display.
I kept all my clothes in place
yet I was naked to your eyes,
leaving behind all my grace
I forced you to hear my cries.
Unfolding my story
giving away my parts,
I served you my glory
by pouring out my heart.
Years of uncertainty
has my stomach in knots,
guilty for a moment of vanity
I am done calling the shots.
Please free me from this bond
I don't want your attention anymore
of you I am no longer fond...
Why? Because,
I'm not your *****
so stop demanding encore.

There are parts

of mine

that are

far from fine,

I hide them well

behind

a mask so pretty

concealing an ugly mind,

dark-dingy corners

where

I don't let in the

Sun's glare,

filthy and messy

with litters from past

devilish and doomed

been from the very start,

I'm twisted

inside-out

cold and unlovable

without a doubt.

But I keep

all this

to myself

like a kiss,

that's too *****

to share

like a secret

I bear

&

add

layer

after

layer

burying these

demons and evils

deeper and deeper

calming the

impending upheavals.