Giving a ****
Why I ditched that ****
Sat making me sick
Liquor spilled real thick
It's so easy to quit
To not give a ****
To see your life split
Warring within
My days are still spent
Wishing I was dead
Except sober instead
Still stuck in bed
Still cycles in my head
I can't catch a breath
I meditate to rest
Still heavy in my chest
Jun 5, 2019
Jun 5, 2019 at 7:28 PM UTC
Giving a ****
Why I ditched that ****
Sat making me sick
Liquor spilled real thick
It's so easy to quit
To not give a ****
To see your life split
Warring within
My days are still spent
Wishing I was dead
Except sober instead
Still stuck in bed
Still cycles in my head
I can't catch a breath
I meditate to rest
Still heavy in my chest
I have been taking the last year and a half to dedicate to trying to be a better person to myself, treat myself with respect, and find the ability to have real love for myself. But it is really difficult work. And I hoped that just stopping abusing alcohol would magically cure everything. It didn't. But I have moments of clarity where I am thankful to myself for going down this path and keeping on it. It's actually the opposite of the easy way out - it's hard work getting to know yourself (again, or for the first time) and it takes a lot of courage and bravery to really face yourself as you really are.
