Shoo seagulls, leave me alone,
I’m hungry and I’m heading home.
Just stopped in quickly for a bite,
I ain’t cooking when I get in tonight.
I ordered a salad, a burger, some fries,
Grabbed my bag with victory in eyes.
Made my way out, eager and done,
Dreaming of dinner, peace to come.
Got to the car, no reason to hide,
Opened the door, thought I’d already won as I got inside.
But hiding in plain sight, bold and bright,
Those air-born villains, little ****** took to flight.
They narrowed in and took their chance,
No warning given, no courting, no romance.
They swooped in hard without delay,
Stole my ****** chips away.
Shoo seagulls, what are you doing here?
******** on cars and spreading fear.
Aren’t you meant for the open sea,
Or beaches with your fish for free?
I’m seriously not impressed
You’ve turned my meal into a stress.
I spilled my salad, I spilt my drink,
You robbed my fries in half a blink.
What the hell’s a parking lot to you?
Is this revenge for what we do?
We took your fish, your ocean scraps
So now you strike with drive-thru traps.
Shoo seagulls… I just wanted fries.
Not feathered thieves with hungry eyes.
So maybe it’s not you I blame,
Just hands that played a greedy game.
i’m ****** off — truthfully
Not at the gulls, but humanity.
We drove them so far from their own sea…
And now you’re stealing fries from me!
Feb 5
Feb 5, 2026 at 8:06 PM UTC
Shoo seagulls, leave me alone,
I’m hungry and I’m heading home.
Just stopped in quickly for a bite,
I ain’t cooking when I get in tonight.
I ordered a salad, a burger, some fries,
Grabbed my bag with victory in eyes.
Made my way out, eager and done,
Dreaming of dinner, peace to come.
Got to the car, no reason to hide,
Opened the door, thought I’d already won as I got inside.
But hiding in plain sight, bold and bright,
Those air-born villains, little ****** took to flight.
They narrowed in and took their chance,
No warning given, no courting, no romance.
They swooped in hard without delay,
Stole my ****** chips away.
Shoo seagulls, what are you doing here?
******** on cars and spreading fear.
Aren’t you meant for the open sea,
Or beaches with your fish for free?
I’m seriously not impressed
You’ve turned my meal into a stress.
I spilled my salad, I spilt my drink,
You robbed my fries in half a blink.
What the hell’s a parking lot to you?
Is this revenge for what we do?
We took your fish, your ocean scraps
So now you strike with drive-thru traps.
Shoo seagulls… I just wanted fries.
Not feathered thieves with hungry eyes.
So maybe it’s not you I blame,
Just hands that played a greedy game.
i’m ****** off — truthfully
Not at the gulls, but humanity.
We drove them so far from their own sea…
And now you’re stealing fries from me!
