SOCIAL DISTANCING
by Michelle Awad
I have tried
swallowing
my pride, but my
pride
is jagged of edge
and bitter of taste,
I have
to **** on it
for a while
before
it’ll go down
properly. Too often,
loving myself is like
taking a dry pill,
there is always
this thing stuck
in my esophagus,
and I think maybe it’s
words, so here I am, and
I think maybe it’s
shameful,
so here I am, I
went inside
just now
thinking I’d lay myself
in your lap
without warning,
but the mood
wasn’t right, I don’t know
how else to explain it,
it feels like
we are low on battery,
we need charging,
it’s a
blackout, we’re a city,
I
don’t know how else to
explain it, and how do
you
begin to repair what
is
broken in ways
you
can’t explain? So
instead
I sat on the opposite end
of the couch,
I listened to you
relay
a conversation you were
having
with technology. You
are an excellent translator,
but this isn’t my idea
of communicating. I
decided
to come outside and
write this,
instead of kissing you,
and that sounds crazy to me,
to do anything
instead of kissing you,
that’s ******* crazy, all we
ever
talk about
is this ******* quarantine,
how on earth
do we feel
so far apart lately.
Mar 28, 2020
Mar 28, 2020 at 3:19 PM UTC
SOCIAL DISTANCING
by Michelle Awad
I have tried
swallowing
my pride, but my
pride
is jagged of edge
and bitter of taste,
I have
to **** on it
for a while
before
it’ll go down
properly. Too often,
loving myself is like
taking a dry pill,
there is always
this thing stuck
in my esophagus,
and I think maybe it’s
words, so here I am, and
I think maybe it’s
shameful,
so here I am, I
went inside
just now
thinking I’d lay myself
in your lap
without warning,
but the mood
wasn’t right, I don’t know
how else to explain it,
it feels like
we are low on battery,
we need charging,
it’s a
blackout, we’re a city,
I
don’t know how else to
explain it, and how do
you
begin to repair what
is
broken in ways
you
can’t explain? So
instead
I sat on the opposite end
of the couch,
I listened to you
relay
a conversation you were
having
with technology. You
are an excellent translator,
but this isn’t my idea
of communicating. I
decided
to come outside and
write this,
instead of kissing you,
and that sounds crazy to me,
to do anything
instead of kissing you,
that’s ******* crazy, all we
ever
talk about
is this ******* quarantine,
how on earth
do we feel
so far apart lately.