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Namaz was less prayer and more about Standing beside Amma and mirroring her, When as a toddler I stood on the chataai Murmuring as she did, Bending down as she did, Resting my head on the floor And then waiting to come back up When she did, Some days I'd be so sleepy I'd sway on the mat, Only to be jolted up by an angry Hmph! from her side, Some days the patterns on the mat seemed like They were God's silhouette- something she always denied, Times of silently bonding with the Almighty and the Amma, Slowly faded into me deciding to pray solo, When the hour of maghrib coincided with a Mother-daughter tiff, And even when we stood praying side by side, I'd make it a point to not let our sajdas coincide, On the mat laying bare our rifts and divides. I wonder if Amma noticed me daydreaming during prayer, My musings whether God understood English, My requests to Him to make that crush like me back, My teenage self angrily bubbling at her obtrusions to my 'freedom' As she prayed and prayed for me. Years have passed, And how I'd love to synchronise again, The pace of our prayer, the length of our sajda, But the days, and this new house, Are now ridden with so much more clutter, That, though the chataai has stayed the same, There's not enough space to accommodate Both daughter and mother.
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Jan 19, 2018
Jan 19, 2018 at 10:47 AM UTC
The Praying Mat
Namaz was less prayer and more about Standing beside Amma and mirroring her, When as a toddler I stood on the chataai Murmuring as she did, Bending down as she did, Resting my head on the floor And then waiting to come back up When she did, Some days I'd be so sleepy I'd sway on the mat, Only to be jolted up by an angry Hmph! from her side, Some days the patterns on the mat seemed like They were God's silhouette- something she always denied, Times of silently bonding with the Almighty and the Amma, Slowly faded into me deciding to pray solo, When the hour of maghrib coincided with a Mother-daughter tiff, And even when we stood praying side by side, I'd make it a point to not let our sajdas coincide, On the mat laying bare our rifts and divides. I wonder if Amma noticed me daydreaming during prayer, My musings whether God understood English, My requests to Him to make that crush like me back, My teenage self angrily bubbling at her obtrusions to my 'freedom' As she prayed and prayed for me. Years have passed, And how I'd love to synchronise again, The pace of our prayer, the length of our sajda, But the days, and this new house, Are now ridden with so much more clutter, That, though the chataai has stayed the same, There's not enough space to accommodate Both daughter and mother.
chataai - mat sajda - prostration to God maghrib - fourth obligatory prayer of the day
ghazal-tansir
Written by
Jan 19, 2018
Jan 19, 2018 at 10:47 AM UTC
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