The battle begins in the dark.
With a stabbing inhale you rip me open.
Tear me from sleep--heart pounding,
we wrestle in a distant corner of the bed.
Wake no one,
say nothing;
it's not his problem.
I know every trick in your book:
the immobilizing grip, poisoned gut wrenching fear,
the way you force my eyes open, pushing back fitful dreams.
Yes, I know your tricks, but knowing hasn't helped me yet.
I can drown you with a bottle in the night,
but your back before the dawn, gnawing my insides.
Should I starve you of sleep,
your joint locks force and turn the choice against me.
After so long the war has become intimate--familiar and rhythmic--
our private, frenzied dance
ragged breath and fevered steps memorized
culminate in a flawless performance.
In this state I begin to imagine that I wanted it this way.
What would my life be without so practiced, so relentless a partner?
Mar 5, 2014
Mar 5, 2014 at 2:13 PM UTC
The battle begins in the dark.
With a stabbing inhale you rip me open.
Tear me from sleep--heart pounding,
we wrestle in a distant corner of the bed.
Wake no one,
say nothing;
it's not his problem.
I know every trick in your book:
the immobilizing grip, poisoned gut wrenching fear,
the way you force my eyes open, pushing back fitful dreams.
Yes, I know your tricks, but knowing hasn't helped me yet.
I can drown you with a bottle in the night,
but your back before the dawn, gnawing my insides.
Should I starve you of sleep,
your joint locks force and turn the choice against me.
After so long the war has become intimate--familiar and rhythmic--
our private, frenzied dance
ragged breath and fevered steps memorized
culminate in a flawless performance.
In this state I begin to imagine that I wanted it this way.
What would my life be without so practiced, so relentless a partner?
