A desperation grows with every diminshment
Of what once was me to a soldering ash
As the boundaries that kept me afloat
Vanish into a cloud of poisonous smoke
I draw you in with my tongue
Yet warn you away with my eyes
I wish so much to hold you close to my heart
Yet I fear your presence and wish you to be gone
I want you to change faces to the one that I loved
The one that I yearn for, that I am dying for
Yet I don't want that either for I fear it will lead
To my demise as the sweetness on your breath
Is bitter on mine, the sourness seeping in
And so I blow it out with medicine in my lungs
My only release aside from my impending doom
I want for all my troubles to subside
But instead I prayed yours to be put on me
And here I stand a man of my word
Watching you frolic, your hand entwined with another's
While I ponder the necessity of my life
And find it to be pointless, worthless
How can on be loved and love in return
When they don't love themselves?
When they question why they are a piece of a picture
Solely because they were a let down, a lesser?
With a troubled sigh and a nodding head
I close this fraction of my thoughts with this
Perhaps the sun is only beautiful when it shines on you
But is devilishly deceptive when its glorious glow
Is directed towards those around you