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Getting to old to gamble on time

~inspired by a poem and messages from fellow poets ~

who have ridden beside me here,

for a decade plus,

SE Reimer, & Sally Bayan~

 

**we take our meds, vitamins and supplements

routinely, faithfully and with a big smile

of self-bemusement at all the times I mocked

those sillys who believed that

hu man

can

override his prescribed

sentencing

 

record almost every morsel that passes through my portals, reporting quantity and quality to remind me of my human needs, but

more to gauge my wearing weaknesses, and

make confession of

my sins of gourmand commission

 

and despite this and more, regular checkups, and blah blah blah, No Lies told here, the aging days are upon us, my brow furrowed

by a lengthening To Do list, that is endlessly

refurbished with more additions than

subtractions, ergo, the list grows longer as fast as the days remaining,

grow shorter,

ever faster!

 

no kidding myself, you feel (really) the cells

slowing their recovery, their fading fastness in every little thing, we squint where we used

to go without trepidation, we twist and turn

to musical utterances and undertones that

are groans and laughter at the old carcass’s

refreshing harmonic epiphany

of time’s passage

 

and think well,

I’ll do that tomorrow,

handle that later,

deal with that problem surely

eventually,

 

and the only thing that is attended to almost

instantly, is writing here,

last gasp observations,

that my being demands be issued now!

in time beating to

my slowing heart rate,

or factually,

my rapidly

rising rate,

each a contradictory economic indicator

of the same,

singular portending trend

 

so here I am ribbing and scribbling myself

before you, prompted by a gorgeously written poem by my friend (1) and the departure of another to a faraway land

where they live, my failure to meet, a shameful delay by an old man’s cautious

fear, that should not be abided…

 

is this a poem,

a cri de coeur,

a confession -

something of all three, but it is done,

breaths and words rapidly expelled, and for once. I feel like I have, once, now, gambled

against time, and actually

 

won

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Written by
nat-lipstadt
99 / M / NYC/Lippstadt/Kraków
Published
Dec 8, 2024
Lines·Words
57·354
Notes

443am 12/7/2024

(1) https://hellopoetry.com/poem/4931472/on-heart-preparation/

Tags
#old#gamble#time#lipstadt
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