Letters from Mom - Letter 3 of 4: More news from home
**Dear my Dearest *****
Oh, what a boring new week here;
nothing happens…
We went to the post office to send
you the heavy coat you asked for
with the metal buttons
And the new clerk at the post office said
the coat’s too heavy with them metal buttons
so he cut off all the buttons
and then the weight was right
and so he put the metal buttons in the pockets
You’ll find them right there in the coat –
ain’t he mighty helpful…
And the cemetery people sent Dad another notice
said If he don’t pay another 100 dollars
for the grave where they put Grandma down in
then, they said: “Up she comes!”
and dear, dear old Uncle Woods
he fell drunk into the local whiskey vat and died
and he was cremated, as he’d always wanted
and no one here needed lights three nights
for Uncle Woods, he burned so bright all three
days and nights…
Oh and one last thing
Little Tim and I were trapped
in the car two hours
cos Dad locked the keys in the car;
and it took him so long to get me
and Little Tim out…
Sometimes I think
Dad’s really going senile before his time
Write to me, or call us again, Darl *****
Your loving Mom
P.S. *We wanted to send you some money in
But this envelope here is already sealed*
Jan 18, 2013
Jan 18, 2013 at 7:54 PM UTC
Letters from Mom - Letter 3 of 4: More news from home
**Dear my Dearest *****
Oh, what a boring new week here;
nothing happens…
We went to the post office to send
you the heavy coat you asked for
with the metal buttons
And the new clerk at the post office said
the coat’s too heavy with them metal buttons
so he cut off all the buttons
and then the weight was right
and so he put the metal buttons in the pockets
You’ll find them right there in the coat –
ain’t he mighty helpful…
And the cemetery people sent Dad another notice
said If he don’t pay another 100 dollars
for the grave where they put Grandma down in
then, they said: “Up she comes!”
and dear, dear old Uncle Woods
he fell drunk into the local whiskey vat and died
and he was cremated, as he’d always wanted
and no one here needed lights three nights
for Uncle Woods, he burned so bright all three
days and nights…
Oh and one last thing
Little Tim and I were trapped
in the car two hours
cos Dad locked the keys in the car;
and it took him so long to get me
and Little Tim out…
Sometimes I think
Dad’s really going senile before his time
Write to me, or call us again, Darl *****
Your loving Mom
P.S. *We wanted to send you some money in
But this envelope here is already sealed*
This series is dedicated to Victoria, yes Our Lady of Good Cheer, here at HP…
The idea for a poem of humour on mothers came about from a recent comment by Victoria on my poem: “no charge”:
“ I know little of physics...much about mothering...”
...poems based on an online joke...
Request permission to use this poem