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i don’t know how much i relate to fortnight until i am three drinks in and your name is the only word i know i was functioning they said she is fine she is coping what they didn’t see was that the bottle was the only thing standing between me and the truth of you you were the reason no one is here to blame but your quiet treason cut so much deeper than anything loud ever did when she said your wife bought us flowers i felt something i have no clean word for because flowers mean forever and forever was supposed to be a thing we whispered to each other one day you will belong to a name that is not mine and i will just be the girl you used to reach for in the dark endless february that is what you are cold and long and somehow i keep waking up in it the pills made me feel something close to okay but okay wore off and you never did i loved you past the point of sense past the point of good for me past the point of no return i still do and it is the most honest devastating thing i have ever admitted we feel each other across every room every mile every silence and still you are so far from me not in distance but in the place where it matters most i am still here still yours in all the ways that don’t count and it is ruining me beautifully completely and i let it
0
May 7
May 7, 2026 at 12:58 AM UTC
Endless February
i don’t know how much i relate to fortnight until i am three drinks in and your name is the only word i know i was functioning they said she is fine she is coping what they didn’t see was that the bottle was the only thing standing between me and the truth of you you were the reason no one is here to blame but your quiet treason cut so much deeper than anything loud ever did when she said your wife bought us flowers i felt something i have no clean word for because flowers mean forever and forever was supposed to be a thing we whispered to each other one day you will belong to a name that is not mine and i will just be the girl you used to reach for in the dark endless february that is what you are cold and long and somehow i keep waking up in it the pills made me feel something close to okay but okay wore off and you never did i loved you past the point of sense past the point of good for me past the point of no return i still do and it is the most honest devastating thing i have ever admitted we feel each other across every room every mile every silence and still you are so far from me not in distance but in the place where it matters most i am still here still yours in all the ways that don’t count and it is ruining me beautifully completely and i let it
Syxxove07
Written by
18/F/London
May 7
May 7, 2026 at 12:58 AM UTC
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