Where am I?
Unwittingly caught in an invisible struggle
Realizing not, that my soul it tried to smuggle
Who am I?
Of this I was unaware
Nor, at times seemed to care
What am I?
How did this come to be?
This was not me!
As winter's breath brushed my cheek
Revelation came...I was weak
Tears I cried as I glanced inside
* *
* *
* *
Light...from within and outwith...blocked...intermittently
Shrouded by this fog
...............Losing control
D
E
E
P
E
R...I would fall into this sinkhole
B...out, I could...
M
I
L
C
S
L
I
D
E...down again, I would...
Enough! It was time again for me to care
And find that someone with time to spare
It did not work trying this on my own
I realized that I could not do this alone
Cloudy was the day
And Sunshine helped point the way
Support was something I would need often
And was given by an adherent of Dauphin
An old farmer provided directions
To help set up those connections
And a man of affluence
With whom I once had influence
Helped pull back the curtain
And reaffirmed my path I am certain
What am I?
I am Love and Light from above
Who am I?
Of this I am well aware
It is for others I care
Where am I?
Standing in the beautiful light of day
Far removed from my personal Cenote
Mar 3, 2019
Mar 3, 2019 at 9:10 PM UTC
Where am I?
Unwittingly caught in an invisible struggle
Realizing not, that my soul it tried to smuggle
Who am I?
Of this I was unaware
Nor, at times seemed to care
What am I?
How did this come to be?
This was not me!
As winter's breath brushed my cheek
Revelation came...I was weak
Tears I cried as I glanced inside
* *
* *
* *
Light...from within and outwith...blocked...intermittently
Shrouded by this fog
...............Losing control
D
E
E
P
E
R...I would fall into this sinkhole
B...out, I could...
M
I
L
C
S
L
I
D
E...down again, I would...
Enough! It was time again for me to care
And find that someone with time to spare
It did not work trying this on my own
I realized that I could not do this alone
Cloudy was the day
And Sunshine helped point the way
Support was something I would need often
And was given by an adherent of Dauphin
An old farmer provided directions
To help set up those connections
And a man of affluence
With whom I once had influence
Helped pull back the curtain
And reaffirmed my path I am certain
What am I?
I am Love and Light from above
Who am I?
Of this I am well aware
It is for others I care
Where am I?
Standing in the beautiful light of day
Far removed from my personal Cenote
Writing is such wonderful therapy, well, actually, creation in general is amazing therapy for us all. I never thought of myself as ever being truly unhappy, let alone depressed...but for a couple of years I some how kept sliding down that sinkhole. I was not always down during this time, but there certainly was an undercurrent...other than being a dad which is such a joyful experience, not much else really mattered and there was a general lack of a joie de vie which was not normal for me. In not seeing the forest through the trees I simply felt I could conquer anything by myself without help...which is obviously incorrect. Thankfully I have help and, although belatedly, was willing to accept it...I never really liked burdening people with my problems...and my ego felt it could handle anything thrown it's way...but that is what the ego does. The process, once I opened myself up to the help, was relatively fast...it seemed like each week something new was re-awakened..I noticed more light coming into me...followed by light being emitted by me again...to saying "live is great...I love life"...words that had not escaped my lips in years....then I was humbled by the power of that which was trying to take my soul. I truly realized who I was...I am here to help others as re-enforced by many, especially a man of affluence...my goal is to share my energy, love and passion for life and uplift others and hopefully help them to feel that same power in sharing our energy. I truly believe in the Prince song...Live 4 Love...and again, that was not totally shrouded, but was enough of the time to take me off my path within my life's journey. My actions, for which I am responsible, during this time confused, worried and hurt some people and that makes me feel very sad...not depressed, just sad. I am fully confident, because I know that I am not alone...that I am back on my path...the path of light...being in-tune with the Divine and being alert for the synchronicity in my life. As I work on forgiving myself and fully loving myself again...which is my current task...my focus is on the present and a future filled with la joie la vie...life is good!
Live 4 Love
Shawn White Eagle
(c) 2019 Shawn White Eagle
