I really don't know what to say right now
he's rotting from the inside out
and I do not care if he lives or dies
because either way he won't harm anymore lives
can't really do much with no fingers or feet
which turned black like his touch
a rash became too much
and only the ****** in his veins
kept him standing-up
but it'll affect his children
the ones he does not have custody of
but I think a part of me always hoped
that one day
he'd admit to everything he had done
and he'd apologize for it all
that he'd change his ways
do some good
I'd let it all go if he tried to do better
because nothing is unforgiveable
and people can change -- I've seen it
but he never did
he never did
and now he's rotting from the inside out
heart infected
brain damaged
blackened fingers and toes
and I feel bad that I do not feel bad
I feel bad for the times I thought
that the only way he'd ever stop
was if he died.
Now it seems he's dying.
And he's rotting from the inside out.
Perhaps that is punishment enough.
Dec 1, 2021
Dec 1, 2021 at 12:57 PM UTC
I really don't know what to say right now
he's rotting from the inside out
and I do not care if he lives or dies
because either way he won't harm anymore lives
can't really do much with no fingers or feet
which turned black like his touch
a rash became too much
and only the ****** in his veins
kept him standing-up
but it'll affect his children
the ones he does not have custody of
but I think a part of me always hoped
that one day
he'd admit to everything he had done
and he'd apologize for it all
that he'd change his ways
do some good
I'd let it all go if he tried to do better
because nothing is unforgiveable
and people can change -- I've seen it
but he never did
he never did
and now he's rotting from the inside out
heart infected
brain damaged
blackened fingers and toes
and I feel bad that I do not feel bad
I feel bad for the times I thought
that the only way he'd ever stop
was if he died.
Now it seems he's dying.
And he's rotting from the inside out.
Perhaps that is punishment enough.
©Tatiana
I've made mistakes myself. Times where I've hurt my family because I thought I was doing something right but it turned out I was way off the mark. And that guilt still haunts me sometimes, never mind the fact that I apologized and changed my ways. I've even been forgiven and I'm so different now compared to when I was 16/17 yrs old. So I can't understand how he continued to keep doing bad things over and over again. Everyone in my family gave him chances to get back on his feet and he threw them all away. He kept hurting people and not once did he ever admit to it or apologize for any of it. And I just don't get it. Why couldn't he have done better?
I learn that I ****** up and then I do better. He never learned from his mistakes/bad choices.
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