I feel it coming back again
That little yearning to draw blood again
*Shred my skin,
Tear it off
Let me bleed and feel this pain*
Tears are rolling down my cheeks
As I try not to scream
My father sits in the next room,
Blissfully unaware
This is one thing I will not share
*This is the moment when I just
Want to tear myself to shreds
Just for the pain, sweet pain
I hate feeling numb
Cold
Empty
Give me real pain
Give me warm blood
Give me something to count on*
Why is this suddenly coming back?
Oh, all the terror is coming back
*Don’t scream, don’t cry
You don’t want to explain to daddy why*
And, a mile away, my soul mate lies
Alseep, and dancing with a nightmare
Or awake, lost in the fiction of a video game
Either way he does not know
That I am suffering
But that’s okay,
I’ll keep it that way
For now,
Just let me suffer in silence, alone
*That’s the way it always goes
That is how it will always go
Alone, I cry
Alone, I convince myself not to die
Don’t bleed, don’t cry
Don’t scream, and don’t cry
There will only be more pain
If you let yourself fall back*
Can I do this? Can I prevent bloodshed,
Fresh scars on my skin?
I don’t trust myself, I don’t know
I don’t know
**** it all, I just don’t know.
May 4, 2016
May 4, 2016 at 7:46 AM UTC
I feel it coming back again
That little yearning to draw blood again
*Shred my skin,
Tear it off
Let me bleed and feel this pain*
Tears are rolling down my cheeks
As I try not to scream
My father sits in the next room,
Blissfully unaware
This is one thing I will not share
*This is the moment when I just
Want to tear myself to shreds
Just for the pain, sweet pain
I hate feeling numb
Cold
Empty
Give me real pain
Give me warm blood
Give me something to count on*
Why is this suddenly coming back?
Oh, all the terror is coming back
*Don’t scream, don’t cry
You don’t want to explain to daddy why*
And, a mile away, my soul mate lies
Alseep, and dancing with a nightmare
Or awake, lost in the fiction of a video game
Either way he does not know
That I am suffering
But that’s okay,
I’ll keep it that way
For now,
Just let me suffer in silence, alone
*That’s the way it always goes
That is how it will always go
Alone, I cry
Alone, I convince myself not to die
Don’t bleed, don’t cry
Don’t scream, and don’t cry
There will only be more pain
If you let yourself fall back*
Can I do this? Can I prevent bloodshed,
Fresh scars on my skin?
I don’t trust myself, I don’t know
I don’t know
**** it all, I just don’t know.
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