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i cannot face a day without acknowledging a loss. i cannot fathom such a wilderness grew so close to my place, my society-free, impositionless place a tepid forest inhabited by the requiems of the agnostically murdered and the cogged wheels of the deceased's clocks. sometimes they stick and the clockmaster unsticks them, but they stop up again ever so quickly. there is nobody who has the time or effort to continually watch the clocks. and they return to ticking an eldritch song which may cause pain. it has not abolished mine, nor shall forth be disseminated to do so. i am an ascetic mastermind, abiding in my messy pool of thought, without my womb, without my brood, without my broom to tidy the mishmash of unruly cobwebs and such. the fumes cause me to wonder “where is my world, which i’ve fondled so dearly?” i detox and recycle memories, it’s to no worth of you a venomous whisper on a silver lining of a dream tells you everything: a fanatic’s agenda degrading urbane, a plummeting depth to deep impact, i drift away on a molten lava lilypad, and fantasize that... i am god but i haven’t found time to juggle your sect reissuing lessons to mind the sheriff and i cannot bear to lead me, to my own cultural death. i cannot receive your moral disease, a signal on my knees con e preghiere sbiancante. can’t you understand it? my life is spent with hope placed on each pair of snake eyes i roll chance is the meter for everything. dare i dare go back to my fantasizing, i am god ashamed by the lack of hope, and regret disgraced by the hate and intolerance of man and i see now their perfect world, is everything i detest. and the tears produced form new embryos of emotions crystalline structures of psychological proportions which develop into mature, sentient, and emotion-proof organisms. which become i. and i respond vehemently yet come to my senses in a diplomatic tone, because i am a diplomat. and i have learned to nail my destiny to an altar each night, an altar which can sacrifice my pensive motives and my self-incriminating philosophy that i should be able to write my destiny, and not have it planned and read aloud, read out loud, out in the air, outside. i try myself. i tempt myself. and i return to supplicated suffering about my own mortality and the atoms i will never see and the universe i will never span and the people i will never meet and the times i will never live. what if i rivered thirty silver-coins: ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ what if i didn’t ? i might be ****** for this: but i’ll still set fire to the catacombs. i might be scourged for this: but i’ll still hold on, hoping there’s skin on my bones. ecclesia, – a common, a sanctuary, a vanguard from the darkness in the world. i know what i should do but never ever get it done; i know what i have been and what i will become. not defined by a dimension nor reputed by a benchmark but shaded by the passion and dissuaded by the lashes. i’ll do anything you want me to, if you **** the self-inflicted psalms i plead! the ulcer grows that sweet cologne i ***** it into the unknown. i won’t tax your soul, i won’t stick a price to it: coins ◌◌◌◌◌ won’t fill the hole -in a business deal (assets corrode) i won’t tax your soul (i won’t buy it with blood money ◌◌◌◌◌, no) it’s yours alone (but in business deals, deficit is prone) and there’s an aspect {a static} of forever and the inescapable gap between the conscious and the desired. i sit here, ever so comfy and lustrous, and habitually wait the day they merge. my invitations stand clear. if you cannot come, i’ll wait for you. hidden in the grillework of my past. but if you cannot come, i’ll be waiting. hidden in the warmth of our teepee haus, i’ll wait for you. if X Marx the spot then why Kant i Locke it up? could living hand-to-mouth so long make me so Jung?
0
Dec 17, 2013
Dec 17, 2013 at 12:53 AM UTC
divine psychobabble
i cannot face a day without acknowledging a loss. i cannot fathom such a wilderness grew so close to my place, my society-free, impositionless place a tepid forest inhabited by the requiems of the agnostically murdered and the cogged wheels of the deceased's clocks. sometimes they stick and the clockmaster unsticks them, but they stop up again ever so quickly. there is nobody who has the time or effort to continually watch the clocks. and they return to ticking an eldritch song which may cause pain. it has not abolished mine, nor shall forth be disseminated to do so. i am an ascetic mastermind, abiding in my messy pool of thought, without my womb, without my brood, without my broom to tidy the mishmash of unruly cobwebs and such. the fumes cause me to wonder “where is my world, which i’ve fondled so dearly?” i detox and recycle memories, it’s to no worth of you a venomous whisper on a silver lining of a dream tells you everything: a fanatic’s agenda degrading urbane, a plummeting depth to deep impact, i drift away on a molten lava lilypad, and fantasize that... i am god but i haven’t found time to juggle your sect reissuing lessons to mind the sheriff and i cannot bear to lead me, to my own cultural death. i cannot receive your moral disease, a signal on my knees con e preghiere sbiancante. can’t you understand it? my life is spent with hope placed on each pair of snake eyes i roll chance is the meter for everything. dare i dare go back to my fantasizing, i am god ashamed by the lack of hope, and regret disgraced by the hate and intolerance of man and i see now their perfect world, is everything i detest. and the tears produced form new embryos of emotions crystalline structures of psychological proportions which develop into mature, sentient, and emotion-proof organisms. which become i. and i respond vehemently yet come to my senses in a diplomatic tone, because i am a diplomat. and i have learned to nail my destiny to an altar each night, an altar which can sacrifice my pensive motives and my self-incriminating philosophy that i should be able to write my destiny, and not have it planned and read aloud, read out loud, out in the air, outside. i try myself. i tempt myself. and i return to supplicated suffering about my own mortality and the atoms i will never see and the universe i will never span and the people i will never meet and the times i will never live. what if i rivered thirty silver-coins: ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ ◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌◌ what if i didn’t ? i might be ****** for this: but i’ll still set fire to the catacombs. i might be scourged for this: but i’ll still hold on, hoping there’s skin on my bones. ecclesia, – a common, a sanctuary, a vanguard from the darkness in the world. i know what i should do but never ever get it done; i know what i have been and what i will become. not defined by a dimension nor reputed by a benchmark but shaded by the passion and dissuaded by the lashes. i’ll do anything you want me to, if you **** the self-inflicted psalms i plead! the ulcer grows that sweet cologne i ***** it into the unknown. i won’t tax your soul, i won’t stick a price to it: coins ◌◌◌◌◌ won’t fill the hole -in a business deal (assets corrode) i won’t tax your soul (i won’t buy it with blood money ◌◌◌◌◌, no) it’s yours alone (but in business deals, deficit is prone) and there’s an aspect {a static} of forever and the inescapable gap between the conscious and the desired. i sit here, ever so comfy and lustrous, and habitually wait the day they merge. my invitations stand clear. if you cannot come, i’ll wait for you. hidden in the grillework of my past. but if you cannot come, i’ll be waiting. hidden in the warmth of our teepee haus, i’ll wait for you. if X Marx the spot then why Kant i Locke it up? could living hand-to-mouth so long make me so Jung?
There’s a complex relationship with the earth, Pleroma, God, and mortality. And none of it can be solved. We live in such a saddened state today.
Written by
Russian
Dec 17, 2013
Dec 17, 2013 at 12:53 AM UTC
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