12/10/2013
every day
i stare in
the mirror
at the face
before me
and i realize
just how ****
broken i really
am
i move my
fingers
through where
the ghost
of my hair
still stands
it breaks me,
every time
i do it,
it breaks me
i can feel
tears
start to form
under my eyes
this is not me,
i think,
this is not me
but it is
and i cannot
hide from it
any longer
i move my
fingers
to my wrist,
which was
once smooth
now
it's paved
by rail road
tracks
little red
pale
scars
all across
it's a
memory
of the months,
of the years
spent fighting
fighting for
myself
fighting against
myself
i can not
escape it
any longer
my hair is
no more
my scars
are forever
both metaphorically
and literally
i will always
live with this
always
i must learn
to be okay
with it
to know i
have,
or once might,
move on
from this
**for this is
not me**
it's an
extension
of me
that i want
so badly
to rid
i cannot
deny it
but slowly,
and surely,
i am
learning to
hide it
© 2013 Scarlet Van Allen
Dec 10, 2013
Dec 10, 2013 at 6:32 PM UTC
12/10/2013
every day
i stare in
the mirror
at the face
before me
and i realize
just how ****
broken i really
am
i move my
fingers
through where
the ghost
of my hair
still stands
it breaks me,
every time
i do it,
it breaks me
i can feel
tears
start to form
under my eyes
this is not me,
i think,
this is not me
but it is
and i cannot
hide from it
any longer
i move my
fingers
to my wrist,
which was
once smooth
now
it's paved
by rail road
tracks
little red
pale
scars
all across
it's a
memory
of the months,
of the years
spent fighting
fighting for
myself
fighting against
myself
i can not
escape it
any longer
my hair is
no more
my scars
are forever
both metaphorically
and literally
i will always
live with this
always
i must learn
to be okay
with it
to know i
have,
or once might,
move on
from this
**for this is
not me**
it's an
extension
of me
that i want
so badly
to rid
i cannot
deny it
but slowly,
and surely,
i am
learning to
hide it
© 2013 Scarlet Van Allen
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