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sisyphus

it’s morning

groggy-eyed, zombie-like,

stubbled, disheveled,

he rises.

 

Outside is the gleam of dew,

the scent of fresh bloom,

the chatter of birds and squirrels.

Not for him, though,

the brilliant hues of early dawn,

the bustle and cheer of the day just born.

 

Tarry he cant, mustn’t

shouldn’t, oughtn’t

for he has work to do.

 

And so he scurries about,

not much unlike a rat-at-night.

scratching the stubble out,

shocking the slumber out,

with a splash of rusty water

and scented alcohol

 

glassy-eyed on the clammy-cold seat,

with the daily in hand,

he lets in garbage as he lets it out.

(let’s see: “six killed, talks fail,

girl ***** man robbed,

chain snatched, stocks down, jobs lost…)

 

but no, tarry he cant, mustn’t,

shouldn’t, oughtn’t.

for he has work to do.

 

Not for him

to reminisce and wonder

at bright-eyed kids straining at their yokes

to remember that kind teacher

who patted his cheek

and held him to her smock

smelling strangely of

freshly ironed starch.

 

Nor must he think

of progress cards and golden stars

and hobbies learnt at leisure,

of cycling in the rain,

and endless hours spent

under the mango trees

waiting for heaven’s manna,

of books devoured, adventures vicariously lived

in strange English lands

where they breakfasted on

bread and poached eggs and bacon.

 

Nay, tarry he cant, mustnt,

shouldn’t, oughtn’t..

for hasn’t he got work to do?

 

‘ Tis his lot to weave

his own web of chaos

as the road turns a

tangled mess of trails

darting here and braking there

in feverish, frenetic fits

of stopping and going

and spewing

clouds of carbon and venom

and especial epithets

 

no, no, tarry he cant, mustn’t,

shouldn’t, oughtn’t,

for he has work to do.

 

So what if he didn’t see

--just ahead of him on the bike,

the baby’s pink,delicate,

fingers as she clutched

her mamma tight?

--the shriveled, outstretched,

hand that cried for a morsel of mercy

since even the cataracted eye

was drained of hope?

--the strange aromas of

fresh coffee, incense, cigarettes

and some open sewer?

--the signals that said “relax,

you’ve 68,67,66” seconds to go?

 

Not for him to tarry—he cant,

he mustn’t, shouldn’t, oughtn’t, god forbid!

He has work to do!

 

Quotations to send

calls to attend, meetings to sit in,

sipping soulless coffee,

nitpicking.

accounts to tally,

targets to meet;

better still, exceed,

‘in’ trays to empty,

‘out’ trays to fill,

reports to make,

power points to present,

all before lunch

and, strangely, until after

until, outside the prison,

life has , once again, ebbed away.

one more sun has died,

or so cries the muezzin,

some distant bells pealing

in doleful agreement.

oh where has the day gone?

 

Stray thoughts appear

like lights switched on-

thoughts of children, wife,

neighbour

thoughts that convince

that here, indeed, is a person

with kith and kin and others to love.

But no, they must perish—the thoughts—

he must instead focus on the task at hand.

 

of first weaving through

the now dark chaos

of blinding headlights

and urgent horns, darting bikes,

neon fireflies

and reaching ‘home’ where

the ***** is busy cooking

and the cubs scampering…

“hi dad ”says the kid

as he mindlessly waves

his soul numbed by

the monotony of the day just gone

and the tv that’s ever on—

and already on the report for the morrow

 

can he afford to tarry awhile?

to hug, hold, talk?

to share with him

a childhood anecdote?

horrors! he cant, he mustn’t,

absolutely shouldn’t oughtn’t!

for he has work to do!

And so the bedroom light’s on

until long after she’s embraced

by slumber, deep slumber—

her eyes closed

in childlike innocence.

can he watch the slow rhythm of her *****

the languid curves?

the cozy bed

with its promise of warmth?

on the screen , scowling,

is the clutter of data

that must be processed

into bite-sized bits of

decipherable hieroglyphics—

now, not later!

 

Its so dark, so still,

even the stray dog has stopped

howling its pitiful howl

one more cigarette

burnt at the altar of work

one more hour burnt at the stake

he simply cant tarry,

mustn’t, shouldn’t, oughtn’t…

he has work to do.

 

It’s morning.

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Written by
anilkumar-parat
61 / M / Indian
Published
Mar 16, 2010
Lines·Words
155·700
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