Would I Have Been Enough?

christian15g Poems

Maybe I could have done more. Maybe I could have been the one to speak up. Maybe I do have anger issues that I could've managed a lot better. Maybe I didn't give you the attention you needed. Maybe I never lived up to your expectations. Maybe I never reciprocated your effort. Maybe I could have done a better job of merely listening. Would that have been enough to keep you around? Would you want to stick around even through the tough times? Would you decide that you would only leave if you were set up for success? Would you have at least been able to tell me why? Would you have the courage to say goodbye? I failed in a lot of ways, and I'm sure there's a lot we would have done differently. We can't take back what's already happened, and that's what hurts the most. What hurts the most is not saying what I should have said. What hurts the most is feeling my stomach twist and turn every time I see your name come up on my messages. What hurts the most is feeling your eyes fill up with tears. It hurts not to be able to communicate why your eyes tear up when I think about the situation. You should still be here, but you're not. You took a different route, and I can't for the life of me figure out why. Maybe I could have done everything differently, but would that have been enough? Was it always a lost cause? Would I have been enough?