today,
I hang in the balance
I traipse the line between free
and consumed
because you spoke to me
again
really spoke
more than you really ever had
spoke like friends
(maybe more than friends)
and though I thought I was
prepared
I’d practiced
hating you
I’d gotten over it
found someone else
(though that’s not going particularly well)
but no
and I know you
that’s the hardest part
I know you
I know that this you
this you I’m falling for
again
after so many **** times
I’ve lost track
this is not you
this you is the quiet you
the you that likes me
because I’m feisty and a little
different
the you that teases me,
but never to embarrass
the you that knows I’m vulnerable
and cares
the you that flirts but doesn’t force
that is kind and friendly and opens up
and tells me
quiet things
But I know that tomorrow
you’ll be someone else
in the hallway
in passing
across the room
so I’ll miss this you
I’ll get over it
slowly,
as you proceed to ignore me
only to fall
once more
just when I think I’m free
a smile
thrown
as you round the corner
where I stand
your eyes crinkle
at the edges
they see it all
and they know me
and my heart leaps
once again
you know
I know
It’s all happened before
Nov 6, 2018
Nov 6, 2018 at 5:43 PM UTC
today,
I hang in the balance
I traipse the line between free
and consumed
because you spoke to me
again
really spoke
more than you really ever had
spoke like friends
(maybe more than friends)
and though I thought I was
prepared
I’d practiced
hating you
I’d gotten over it
found someone else
(though that’s not going particularly well)
but no
and I know you
that’s the hardest part
I know you
I know that this you
this you I’m falling for
again
after so many **** times
I’ve lost track
this is not you
this you is the quiet you
the you that likes me
because I’m feisty and a little
different
the you that teases me,
but never to embarrass
the you that knows I’m vulnerable
and cares
the you that flirts but doesn’t force
that is kind and friendly and opens up
and tells me
quiet things
But I know that tomorrow
you’ll be someone else
in the hallway
in passing
across the room
so I’ll miss this you
I’ll get over it
slowly,
as you proceed to ignore me
only to fall
once more
just when I think I’m free
a smile
thrown
as you round the corner
where I stand
your eyes crinkle
at the edges
they see it all
and they know me
and my heart leaps
once again
you know
I know
It’s all happened before
ode to those feelings you can never truly be rid of ...
