Hello Poetry
Submit your work and get some sparkles! Create free account
the-anonymous-jokerPoems
the familiar feeling of bile rising from the pits of my stomach all the way up up up now at the bottom of my throat -- i am basically gargling it now some thoughts and fears never leave my mind needlessly conjuring up paranoid scenarios repeatedly my imagination never failing me that familiar choking feeling closing my air passage and hands shaking inhaling and exhaling deeply a panic attack overtaking me black spots on my vision now i try to forget the caricatures drawn in my imagination heart still racing, flecks on the sides of my eyes, throat feeling torn that familiar feeling of helplessness solitude, loneliness, sadness, righteous fury, despair, alone, alone, alone, alone, alone -- no one around my walls are whispering, my memories are ripped apart every relationship, conversation overanalyzed, brought to the forefront of my mind's eye and every worst-case brought up and the walls that once seemed sturdy enough to hold out against the world in my isolation don't feel thick away anymore my dreams, miles away, seem like the worthless struggles of a coward who can only run away, helpless clueless child in some adult body has not read the book everyone in the room already read-  left without pretense and a mask cannot read the cues, hardly knows when to move on and no good at drawing lines or forgetting my heart is pounding, numbness falls over-- everyone leave, leave, leave, leave, leave
0
Dec 29, 2020
Dec 29, 2020 at 6:08 AM UTC
social anxiety
the familiar feeling of bile rising from the pits of my stomach all the way up up up now at the bottom of my throat -- i am basically gargling it now some thoughts and fears never leave my mind needlessly conjuring up paranoid scenarios repeatedly my imagination never failing me that familiar choking feeling closing my air passage and hands shaking inhaling and exhaling deeply a panic attack overtaking me black spots on my vision now i try to forget the caricatures drawn in my imagination heart still racing, flecks on the sides of my eyes, throat feeling torn that familiar feeling of helplessness solitude, loneliness, sadness, righteous fury, despair, alone, alone, alone, alone, alone -- no one around my walls are whispering, my memories are ripped apart every relationship, conversation overanalyzed, brought to the forefront of my mind's eye and every worst-case brought up and the walls that once seemed sturdy enough to hold out against the world in my isolation don't feel thick away anymore my dreams, miles away, seem like the worthless struggles of a coward who can only run away, helpless clueless child in some adult body has not read the book everyone in the room already read-  left without pretense and a mask cannot read the cues, hardly knows when to move on and no good at drawing lines or forgetting my heart is pounding, numbness falls over-- everyone leave, leave, leave, leave, leave
the-anonymous-joker
Written by
the-anonymous-joker
Dec 29, 2020
Dec 29, 2020 at 6:08 AM UTC
Request permission to use this poem