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Anuptaphobia

Ever since the age of ten

I have always preached one thing

Learn to be happy being single

And know you do not need a ring

 

Though I firmly believe it still

You can be happy on your own

I've grown to question if there's a reason

That I prefer to be alone

 

I think it boils down to more

I think I'm really full of fear

It's the underlying reason

Why I don't want people near

 

What if I get in too deep

But they don't feel the same?

What if I'm just strung along

And they play me like a game...

 

What if it's the opposite

I'm the one that they dream of

But no matter what I do

I will never be able to love

 

I have a hidden bigger fear

What if our love is true

What if I find happiness

That can only be found in you

 

What if we get married

And everything is great

What if I've found my one true love

And he gets ripped away by fate

 

I don't think I am strong enough

Since love can only end two ways

The choice is yours, death or divorce

Either way it ends in a blaze.

 

To be in a happy loving relationship

The thing I most secretly wish for

But an even deeper secret than that

Is that it frightens me to the core.

 

Maybe I'll be alone forever...

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Written by
willow-anne
American
Published
May 27, 2015
Lines·Words
37·238
Permission

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