I put another cigarette up to my lips
and hit it with a lit match flame
I take another drag feeling her affections slip
feeling that another day would be just the same
I put the bottle up to my lips
and think of the reasons I shouldn't
I take another pull, a long burning sip
and realize all of the ways love couldn't
be for me what it was for her
with me being confident falsely when I wasn't sure
just looking clean when I was far from pure
holding on tightly when I couldn't always endure
my razor blade taps out another thin white line
with a sharp breath I feel the sting start to numb
I cut out another knowing I'm crossing a line
but it takes the remorse of this that I've become
I take another pill waiting for it's relief
it's bitter taste reminding me of too many nights in a floor
I wonder of my convictions and my true beliefs
so many of the things the filth helps me ignore
I couldn't be for her what she was for me
I couldn't open eyes that didn't want sight to see
I shouldn't have let true love only slightly be
and I shouldn't be surprised at the misery
it is all this sadomasochists sick ride down into the pits of lost pride
but
killing myself slowly doesn't feel so much like suicide
Sep 20, 2012
Sep 20, 2012 at 11:49 PM UTC
I put another cigarette up to my lips
and hit it with a lit match flame
I take another drag feeling her affections slip
feeling that another day would be just the same
I put the bottle up to my lips
and think of the reasons I shouldn't
I take another pull, a long burning sip
and realize all of the ways love couldn't
be for me what it was for her
with me being confident falsely when I wasn't sure
just looking clean when I was far from pure
holding on tightly when I couldn't always endure
my razor blade taps out another thin white line
with a sharp breath I feel the sting start to numb
I cut out another knowing I'm crossing a line
but it takes the remorse of this that I've become
I take another pill waiting for it's relief
it's bitter taste reminding me of too many nights in a floor
I wonder of my convictions and my true beliefs
so many of the things the filth helps me ignore
I couldn't be for her what she was for me
I couldn't open eyes that didn't want sight to see
I shouldn't have let true love only slightly be
and I shouldn't be surprised at the misery
it is all this sadomasochists sick ride down into the pits of lost pride
but
killing myself slowly doesn't feel so much like suicide
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