I give up...
This is like my motto.
But I'm a hypocrite.
I wake up every morning,
Wishing I hadn't.
I'd end things myself,
But I just freeze every time I come close.
Last time...
I was so weak, I had to make one last call...
And that broke me.
I sat there, pills in my hand,
Too weak to say anything but "I'm sorry" over and over while they begged me not to do it...
I wasted too much time, and the next thing I knew, I'd been pinned down, too weak to scream...
Let me go...
I'd breathe out those words, almost to quiet to hear...
Then I woke up the next day.
"I love you. Thank you for being alive."
I actually thought maybe life was worth it,
For a short amount of time...
Now I'm here,
Tears on my keyboard,
Bile tickling my throat,
Wishing I had done it then...
I don't know what else to say.
I can't say goodbye....so I'll see you tomorrow.
I wish that weren't the case.
Mar 11, 2016
Mar 11, 2016 at 10:53 PM UTC
I give up...
This is like my motto.
But I'm a hypocrite.
I wake up every morning,
Wishing I hadn't.
I'd end things myself,
But I just freeze every time I come close.
Last time...
I was so weak, I had to make one last call...
And that broke me.
I sat there, pills in my hand,
Too weak to say anything but "I'm sorry" over and over while they begged me not to do it...
I wasted too much time, and the next thing I knew, I'd been pinned down, too weak to scream...
Let me go...
I'd breathe out those words, almost to quiet to hear...
Then I woke up the next day.
"I love you. Thank you for being alive."
I actually thought maybe life was worth it,
For a short amount of time...
Now I'm here,
Tears on my keyboard,
Bile tickling my throat,
Wishing I had done it then...
I don't know what else to say.
I can't say goodbye....so I'll see you tomorrow.
I wish that weren't the case.
I love you all.
But all I can see is the pain around me...That I caused.
I'm poison to everyone and everything around me.
Promise me you'll never love me.
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