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Alea iacta est

like the inconstant moon I change,

cyclical about circumstances,

serendipity and fortune exchange

appearances for second chances,

 

and as we each alter our perception,

we see ourselves as constant,

each and every change in direction

still seems like a straight line

 

with no more than closer inspection

looking behind to the distant

fading horizon in the failing light

the pattern of circles and spirals

 

and zigzags, stops and backtracks

a wandering chorus line of fools

all singing things I can’t take back

the realization that I am not an individual

:

but an average of multiple formulas

complex variable algebra and simple subtraction

a vector resulting from many forces

pushing and pulling and thrusts and attractions

 

the color of the liquid in the test tube

fizzing and changing with every next drop occurring

an organism that adapts to its environment

to thus fill its requirements and its fleeting yearnings

 

a flock of birds, a can of worms, a herd of cats,

an untamable unit described in terms

of the time it exists in existing- that is

another illustration, another article, at any other time or mood

 

a crop whose fruitfulness is determined by unusual farmers

one field ploughed, one weeded, one fertilized, one seeded

akin to the Bible, a book of numerous authors that tries to

merge allegories into a useful, enlightening anecdote with which to furnish the brood

 

flesh, soul, chemical, inspired, mechanical-Angel

a temptable machine whose springs and cogs

could be found to have been hand-wound

at any given time by either His Rival’s or God’s

 

and if Made in His Image then I must be both

wrathful and loving, vengeful and forgiving,

quick to temper and eternally patient

yet limited in time allowed to be spent living

 

the difference is- my choiceful subsistence briefly caresses

this quick struggle and my purpose not yet fully defined

would fate’s justice have me on the gallows for my excesses?

or would not passion for the endowment of living grant reprieve?

 

where is the solace for the incurably ardent?

maniacally spontaneous, courageously aloof

what cheer can be brought to the seers?

dejected clairvoyants, puppets or puppeteers to the truth

 

however never simultaneously clever are we

always we must be one or the other each seen

though never seemed to be separate things

now see what difficulty wrecks all my dreams

:

catharsis then epiphany then pensive then somber

an artist, a daddy, a mocked captive, an avid doubter

carouse then abolish then regret then absolve

a spouse, a skirmish, an uncommon asset, an outlet resolved

 

how do I bring about the determination of the jury?

which of the accomplices will abide full recognition

and be he who will stand to read the indistinct verdict

to the culpable crowd assembled in this the trial of alternation

 

so contempt be then to the court of constancy!

no thing in heaven or earth adheres to its philosophy

render the sentence that I may be found guilty

yet I am consented to return undestroyed, now let the die be cast

 

these confines beg for stasis I cannot deliver

my cell itself is afloat without a tether

these customs require that I be a quitter

yea though the pendulum returns to the tock once the tic has passed

Request permission to use this poem
Written by
clyde-yulassetar-wiggin
American
Published
Jan 2, 2013
Lines·Words
70·542
Permission

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