It isn’t sadness
so much as gravity.
A constant pull toward the floor
no one else seems to feel.
Mornings arrive already tired.
The light does its best
but never quite reaches
the back rooms of my chest
where things have been stored
for years and forgotten.
People say it will pass,
as if this were weather.
But this is climate.
This is living under a sky
that never storms,
never clears
just stays overcast
until you stop checking.
I function well enough.
I answer messages,
wash cups,
remember birthdays.
On paper, I am fine.
In practice, everything takes
twice the effort
for half the feeling.
Joy shows up occasionally,
polite, brief,
like a neighbour returning mail.
I thank it.
I don’t ask it to stay.
There is no bottom
to hit here,
no dramatic collapse
just a slow erosion
of colour,
of urgency,
of believing that wanting
counts for much.
Still, I keep going.
Not bravely.
Not hopefully.
Just steadily.
Like someone who has learned
how to live
with a weight
that never lifts,
and calls that survival.
Jan 23
Jan 23, 2026 at 10:52 PM UTC
It isn’t sadness
so much as gravity.
A constant pull toward the floor
no one else seems to feel.
Mornings arrive already tired.
The light does its best
but never quite reaches
the back rooms of my chest
where things have been stored
for years and forgotten.
People say it will pass,
as if this were weather.
But this is climate.
This is living under a sky
that never storms,
never clears
just stays overcast
until you stop checking.
I function well enough.
I answer messages,
wash cups,
remember birthdays.
On paper, I am fine.
In practice, everything takes
twice the effort
for half the feeling.
Joy shows up occasionally,
polite, brief,
like a neighbour returning mail.
I thank it.
I don’t ask it to stay.
There is no bottom
to hit here,
no dramatic collapse
just a slow erosion
of colour,
of urgency,
of believing that wanting
counts for much.
Still, I keep going.
Not bravely.
Not hopefully.
Just steadily.
Like someone who has learned
how to live
with a weight
that never lifts,
and calls that survival.
