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The Ways I Can't Talk To You

Newspapers are only covered in ***** print;

 

of despair and distress and danger playing master of our moves.

 

So I can’t talk to you through that.

 

Paintings are for love songs left unsung;

 

they are the inner kept journals of unrequited dreams,

 

scrawls of abuse or lumps of hurt, growing like tumours.

 

You wouldn’t understand.

 

So I can’t talk to you through that.

 

 

Music is only for the sunlit realm of lovers found;

 

of certainty and confidence and devotion above the sordid,

 

tangled affairs of wayward souls.

 

Living in a fantasy to escape the loneliness aching in soft spots inside.

 

So I can’t talk to you through that.

 

Letters are lost in nostalgia;

 

a celebration to be had, words unspoken for decades,

 

births and deaths, reserved for life events detailed in the past.

 

So I can’t talk to you through that.

 

 

Movies are just reenactments of dreams;

 

stunning heroes, masters of skill, justice seekers,

 

adventures of awe, loves broken but patched together with stronger yarn.

 

A world of little lies to helps better cope with heartache and grief.

 

We can’t immortalise ourselves in something

 

when it runs the risk of breaking.

 

So I can’t talk to you through that.

 

But I can do something much harder

 

then writing or filming or singing or painting…

 

I can give it all up, over to you.

 

I can trace patterns across your shoulders as you wake,

 

our special language which tells you I love you, I’m trying to trust you.

 

I can write you little notes, decadent words and sultry ideas,

 

and make a trail for you to follow to me.

 

 

I can be vulnerable in your arms, more than skin and internals

 

and a framework of bones.

 

I can be more real with you than I have never known to be possible.

 

It’s not just me showing how much I need you by the length I hold your kiss,

 

or how long it takes for us to disentangle ourselves from sleep, how often

 

we see each other naked.

 

It’s more the heart I dare draw on your skin with my lips.

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Written by
tamara-fraser
Published
Aug 7, 2016
Lines·Words
38·349
Tags
#healing#self-acceptance#experiences#mentalhealth#makingmoves#iwishyouwouldunderstand#whyicanneverreachyou#thisishowiwilltellyouiloveyou
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