so happy anniversary
of yesterfray
when I peripherally laid
my eyes on you
the day I
didn't believe
because why???
it didn't compute
so my brain pushed it
away away away
because how
could you find it so easy
to replace me and ricochet
between four arms that were
not me
that was my logic:
if you loved me, if it meant
- anything ever -
you wouldn't have
made those decisions
like a haphazard hellbat
rattling off the tracks
so it was
quite obvious
I was just hallucinating
just pasting my aching heart
onto some random guy
who was oddly
not dancing
the truth is deep
and I'm trying to not
have you OD but I think
it's time to increase your dosage
and we're getting closer
closer still to
a mouthful
and one demispoon is
I noticed you the instant
you hit my periphery
maybe 15 feet away
I guess by noticed
I mean my stomach
did a nosedive down
through my intestines
resounding repetition
internal to the tune of
this isn't happening
as you made your way
in front of me
I was petrified
losing my mind
it made no sense
but that feeeeling
had your name
beating down
my lips
and I even pondered
tapping you on the shoulder
to ask something as asinine as
do I know you?
so, here comes
another serum dose
it wasn't until I was
contemplating the potentials
of reactions by you
or not-you
that I remembered
I wasn't alone -
I was, how you say...
with someone?
and maybe you can relate a bit
to how I could possibly find
myself in that situation
so quick
dear Watson, I can certainly now
understand how easy it in fact is
to fall into the arms of someone
you have history and unfinished
karmic business with
when you're
so alone and lonely
feeling lost and hungry
for connection you bypass
all the utterly obvious
ill-fitting cardboard edges
that aren't even the same image
and just focus on the one or two
that click right in, so comforting it is
to walk down the same old street
even though you already know
how and where it ends
it was certainly
a welcome distraction
from picking glass splinters
out of crippled crimson fingers
and now I understand
how you did what you did
and that is why I came back
again...
because it took me that long
to let go of feeling
unloved
and realize
you did
Jul 10, 2017
Jul 10, 2017 at 11:34 AM UTC
so happy anniversary
of yesterfray
when I peripherally laid
my eyes on you
the day I
didn't believe
because why???
it didn't compute
so my brain pushed it
away away away
because how
could you find it so easy
to replace me and ricochet
between four arms that were
not me
that was my logic:
if you loved me, if it meant
- anything ever -
you wouldn't have
made those decisions
like a haphazard hellbat
rattling off the tracks
so it was
quite obvious
I was just hallucinating
just pasting my aching heart
onto some random guy
who was oddly
not dancing
the truth is deep
and I'm trying to not
have you OD but I think
it's time to increase your dosage
and we're getting closer
closer still to
a mouthful
and one demispoon is
I noticed you the instant
you hit my periphery
maybe 15 feet away
I guess by noticed
I mean my stomach
did a nosedive down
through my intestines
resounding repetition
internal to the tune of
this isn't happening
as you made your way
in front of me
I was petrified
losing my mind
it made no sense
but that feeeeling
had your name
beating down
my lips
and I even pondered
tapping you on the shoulder
to ask something as asinine as
do I know you?
so, here comes
another serum dose
it wasn't until I was
contemplating the potentials
of reactions by you
or not-you
that I remembered
I wasn't alone -
I was, how you say...
with someone?
and maybe you can relate a bit
to how I could possibly find
myself in that situation
so quick
dear Watson, I can certainly now
understand how easy it in fact is
to fall into the arms of someone
you have history and unfinished
karmic business with
when you're
so alone and lonely
feeling lost and hungry
for connection you bypass
all the utterly obvious
ill-fitting cardboard edges
that aren't even the same image
and just focus on the one or two
that click right in, so comforting it is
to walk down the same old street
even though you already know
how and where it ends
it was certainly
a welcome distraction
from picking glass splinters
out of crippled crimson fingers
and now I understand
how you did what you did
and that is why I came back
again...
because it took me that long
to let go of feeling
unloved
and realize
you did
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