I walk through the chemistry building
Its been two weeks, but feels like two months
I used to come here to study,
I cried in these halls
Because I liked being surrounded by passion. comfort
I pass by labs,
I peak in and see a student researcher pipetting something, wearing ppe and a mask,
I pass by a danger sign on a door,
Warning of radiation emission,
I assume that the multiple layered doors are very dense and heavy, because that is what it'd take to protect us.
I go into my meeting with my professor,
After watching a former classmate of mine leave his office,
Recall his patronizing comment to me while I was asking a general question to a lab tech standing next to him.
My prof's quick to get to business,
Handing me my exam and the answer sheet.
But as I ask him about how he's doing,
and I talk about wanting to put in more effort,
then ask him again, really, how are you feeling?
his face softens
We talk
He later tells me it's nice to talk to someone who cares, for the subject
And I think to myself, it's nice to talk to someone who sees that I do.
I update him on the research lab that didn't have space to accept me, I'll reapply again later in six months or so.
and he tells me I may have to apply to other labs, she may not have capacity for another couple years.
and I hesitate. should I ask this?
But as I'm trying to be braver, I go ahead and ask:
"Who do you reccomend?"
He then names me some faculty I have already heard of, but then forgot.
We end our meeting, I wish him well, his class was a pleasure,
I then start to look into what I can do;
I revisit this burning yearning of mine,
to help,
I want to be brave.
being afraid is why it must be done
May 27
May 27, 2026 at 3:42 AM UTC
I walk through the chemistry building
Its been two weeks, but feels like two months
I used to come here to study,
I cried in these halls
Because I liked being surrounded by passion. comfort
I pass by labs,
I peak in and see a student researcher pipetting something, wearing ppe and a mask,
I pass by a danger sign on a door,
Warning of radiation emission,
I assume that the multiple layered doors are very dense and heavy, because that is what it'd take to protect us.
I go into my meeting with my professor,
After watching a former classmate of mine leave his office,
Recall his patronizing comment to me while I was asking a general question to a lab tech standing next to him.
My prof's quick to get to business,
Handing me my exam and the answer sheet.
But as I ask him about how he's doing,
and I talk about wanting to put in more effort,
then ask him again, really, how are you feeling?
his face softens
We talk
He later tells me it's nice to talk to someone who cares, for the subject
And I think to myself, it's nice to talk to someone who sees that I do.
I update him on the research lab that didn't have space to accept me, I'll reapply again later in six months or so.
and he tells me I may have to apply to other labs, she may not have capacity for another couple years.
and I hesitate. should I ask this?
But as I'm trying to be braver, I go ahead and ask:
"Who do you reccomend?"
He then names me some faculty I have already heard of, but then forgot.
We end our meeting, I wish him well, his class was a pleasure,
I then start to look into what I can do;
I revisit this burning yearning of mine,
to help,
I want to be brave.
being afraid is why it must be done
its a long life! better stand up straight! we can do much more together. It's not so impossible.
Written on April 20th, 2026.
