ive changed my mind about the beach

it is mid july

and hotter than sin.

some friends and i

drove to the beach

to watch the shore

erode.

i drank some gin

and we talked about

television. i laughed

like i would die

tomorrow.

when we left

and my feet were

******

i couldnt help but

remind myself

that i was happy.

and on the drive home

two friends kiss

in the back like

you do when you

think you have it

figured out

and all you want

is the whole world

and its staring back

at you and even smiles

if you kiss it on

the mouth.

and all i could

think about is the boy

i was mean to as

a child and how

he died before i

could ever say

sorry and really

mean it.

i cant help but

twist a knife

if i see one.

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