Mother listens
while I play Schubert
on the piano,
said Yochana,
my fingers travel
the keyboard
from memory.
Not so fast, she says,
it slows at this passage.
I slow down,
and think of Benedict,
that time he kissed me
on the cheek
on the playing field,
and the time
he watched me play
the piano in the classroom,
his breath on my neck,
his hands on my waist.
Softer here,
my mother says;
I press the keys softer;
I sense her eyes on me
as she sits
in the armchair
as I play.
And the weekend
he stayed here
in our guestroom,
and I crept along
to the room
and climbed
into the bed with him.
My mother
never knew
nor suspected.
I come to the end
and lift my hands away
and cease to play.
Jul 31, 2018
Jul 31, 2018 at 2:41 AM UTC
Mother listens
while I play Schubert
on the piano,
said Yochana,
my fingers travel
the keyboard
from memory.
Not so fast, she says,
it slows at this passage.
I slow down,
and think of Benedict,
that time he kissed me
on the cheek
on the playing field,
and the time
he watched me play
the piano in the classroom,
his breath on my neck,
his hands on my waist.
Softer here,
my mother says;
I press the keys softer;
I sense her eyes on me
as she sits
in the armchair
as I play.
And the weekend
he stayed here
in our guestroom,
and I crept along
to the room
and climbed
into the bed with him.
My mother
never knew
nor suspected.
I come to the end
and lift my hands away
and cease to play.
A girl thinks if a boy while playing the piano 1962
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