A fire burns in my heart
For a girl I once called heaven.
Her mom tore me apart
Then the girl took my dusty remains and set me ablaze.
I'm still here.
I cry in my room alone at night and its been now 9 months.
I miss her sweet whispers and her tender embrace.
I miss her cutest smile and the look on her face.
I get sick.
I get so sick.
I get so sick.
I get so ****** sick.
I...
I
She took all the peices her mom left me in and set me ablaze.
She left above me, a faucet delivering a constant drip of gasoline.
She never turned it off...
I keep burning...
And burning...
And my ashes are burning too...
And the powder left from that is burning too...
She's so happy with her girlfriend of six months.
She's so happy...
Does she know what she did to me?
What she did...it was the most immoral thing a girl will ever do to me...
I may never seek out another...
I hate to dwell...but its so disturbing...did she not realize how she was tearing me apart?
I kept saying and assuming it couldn't be her...
But she sure was glad to correct me...
She sure was happy to watch me squirm...
She made deliberate moves, deliberate decisions, said and did such deliberate, inconsiderate and hurtful things.
She knew...
And that's what hurt most of all...
But it was supposed to.
Here I am...getting uneasy at the sight of her face.
I don't feel attracted to it, or her figure, not one bit.
But I keep hoping she'll say she's sorry...
I keep hoping she'll say she'll fix it...or at least try...
I don't think she understands that I gave her everything I had...
There's nothing left for me to build from...she took it all away...
I keep hoping she didn't discard me...
But she keeps laughing and smiling and hopping and skipping and loving...
Loving everything but me.
I keep thinking about the words I want to say to her...if I get the chance.
I keep changing my mind...
"I still love you..." or
"I miss you everyday..." or
"Please come home..." or
"You're the love of my life..."
I imagine she'd call me a creep...
But all that I really am is everything I promised her I'd be.
I am nothing more and nothing less than I promised her I'd be.
I promised her I'd always love her.
I promised her I'd always be here.
I'm still here... but she can't see me.
I'm still here... but she doesn't love me.
I'm still here.
I don't know how I'm still here.
I don't want to be here but here I am.
She tricked me.