Today you walked into class like you were some big shot,
to be honest it made me mad as hell,
but I pretended like it didn't.
I watched you take your seat where we used to sit,
the cluster of desks looked so empty without me next to you.
Before you looked around i averted my eyes,
I wouldn't allow you to catch me slippin'.
You placed your bag on your desk,
still rocking your head to some unheard beat.
It just seemed to add fuel to my anger.
You sat there all class talking aloud,
asking me small questions here and there,
I ignored you.
Who are you?
Who did you turn into?
Why are you not the boy I fell in love with a year and 5 months ago?
Why can't I hold you or talk to you or even look at you?
Why can't I stop looking at your facebook everyday?
Why can I not regret unfriending you?
Why can't I move on and you can dance and laugh and smile and sleep under bridges go to concerts and act like your whole world hasn't changed completely and just seem like we never existed?!
Like I left no impression on your life, like I was nothing and you lost your memory?!
Why did you make me feel like everything sometimes and nothing the other?
Why Why WHY WHY WHY WHY?!
Its ok,
i looked up today and I saw,
I saw you look away fast and look around the room,
Even when your eyes turned to mine I didn't look away,
In that moment I felt more alive then I have in a month.
I felt happy and warm,
and I miss you so god **** much and I don't know what the **** I'm doing,
and I just hate you because I love you and I hate me for being young and stupid,
and just another ******* girl caught in love at a young age.
**** YOU for doing this to me,
**** YOU FOR MAKING ME SO ******* HAPPY
**** you for letting me leave so easy but yet not so fast.
you ripped the band aid to slow,
now I'm left with a longing after ache.