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It’s been eight hundred twenty-one days Since that day took you away One hundred seventeen weeks and some days Since that day took you away I count it sometimes without meaning to As if time could be measured into understanding As if numbers could soften what remains Since you’ve been gone, I keep moving I learn new languages, new words for the same silence I help children, guide them through small worlds Where things still make sense I study, I read, I build something that looks like a future I do everything I am supposed to do And still I mourn you I walk through days like I belong in them I answer when they ask how I am I say I’m fine I say what fits I say what keeps things from breaking Since you’ve been gone, I can do what I want I can go anywhere I choose I can sit in rooms full of voices and laughter But nothing, I said nothing, removes these truths ’Cause nothing replaces Nothing replaces you It’s been so long and still not long at all Like time learned to stretch without healing Everything continues forward But I remain there In a moment that never finished They tell me I am doing well That I am growing, becoming, improving They see the effort, the movement, the progress They do not see the weight that stays Because I can learn every language And still not find the words I can help every child And still feel the absence I can study, build, and move through every day And still I mourn you Eight hundred twenty-one days One hundred seventeen weeks and some days And still nothing replaces nothing replaces you
0
Apr 2
Apr 2, 2026 at 9:44 AM UTC
Eight Hundred Twenty-One Days
It’s been eight hundred twenty-one days Since that day took you away One hundred seventeen weeks and some days Since that day took you away I count it sometimes without meaning to As if time could be measured into understanding As if numbers could soften what remains Since you’ve been gone, I keep moving I learn new languages, new words for the same silence I help children, guide them through small worlds Where things still make sense I study, I read, I build something that looks like a future I do everything I am supposed to do And still I mourn you I walk through days like I belong in them I answer when they ask how I am I say I’m fine I say what fits I say what keeps things from breaking Since you’ve been gone, I can do what I want I can go anywhere I choose I can sit in rooms full of voices and laughter But nothing, I said nothing, removes these truths ’Cause nothing replaces Nothing replaces you It’s been so long and still not long at all Like time learned to stretch without healing Everything continues forward But I remain there In a moment that never finished They tell me I am doing well That I am growing, becoming, improving They see the effort, the movement, the progress They do not see the weight that stays Because I can learn every language And still not find the words I can help every child And still feel the absence I can study, build, and move through every day And still I mourn you Eight hundred twenty-one days One hundred seventeen weeks and some days And still nothing replaces nothing replaces you
JRhein
Written by
25/F/Köln
Apr 2
Apr 2, 2026 at 9:44 AM UTC
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