I need you
I need your hug
To comfort me
To calm me
I'd love to be close to you
I'd love to cuddle and smile again
I miss you so much my dear
I miss your warmth
This distance leaves me aching
This distance is so hard
But in the end I love you
And in the end your worth it.

I'm feeling like
I don't really
Have anything to
H O LD
Onto anymore
And I'm not
Very good at
H O L D I N G
On by myself.

I use to dream
Of laying down
In the middle
Of a gymnasium

Maybe because if it were
Empty I wouldn't hate it
As much as I normally did

Maybe because the emptiness
Soothed the fire within me

Maybe because that empty room
Symbolized everything

My love that seemed so vast

My barely contained sanity

The walls were my cage

My emotional world boxed in

Maybe I dreamed of laying there in the middle
Because I was so sick of being too invisible
And all too visible at once

Maybe because the silence
Would silence my mind

Maybe I found contentment
With the freedom of such
A large room

Or maybe
I just liked the idea
Of lying in the middle
Of a gymnasium.

While my body
Grips on tight
My strained mind
Tries to slip away
Everyday
Is so hard to bare
Especially without you
Yet in my struggle for
Happiness
I find that I am even more dependent
And that you aren't nearly
So I sit alone tonight
Molding a purple heart
Wanting to smash it
Hoping something
Anything in me
Would come together
If I break it
The still harsh reality is that
I don't like to break hearts
So I'll keep it
Hold it
Make a wish upon it
For clarity in all my chaos
And I shall put it safely away
Hoping it's safety will somehow
Save me and my sanity.

A hurricane swept us away
And for a while i didnt know
Where we were
The storm had swept away
All goodness
And all I could grasp
Was the gray cold air
Suddenly I was on ground again
And the sky cleared
And wherever I  was
I was happy to see light
But the storm in my heart
Raged on
My heart raced
And I worried
Because I just wanted
To go back,
Before the storm
But this sunshine will do
This light will keep me at peace
I must believe the storm has passed.

Why can't they understand
That without him
I sit here and wither away
That everday i found strength in him
And now everyday i find weakness
In his absence
Why can't they see
That without him
I am nothing
That our love torn apart
Damages me
Why can't they see it
I need him.

Come and wrap me
In your loving arms
I need you
While the world
Tries to make me
Lifeless
You make me feel
Alive
So baby
Come hold me
I need you.

It's all emotional for me
Our hugs and kisses
Our hand holding
The way you stare into my eyes
Or kiss me all over my face

It makes me laugh
Makes me feel loved
The way our bodies entwine
Makes my soul feel awakened
As though I had been asleep before you

In your arms I feel content and happy
For me it's all emotional
The words and the actions
They all mean something
And to me they mean everything

When your near it's like the air
Becomes cleaner
Like somehow
Everything will be alright

I know things change
I know you want change
While I fear it

I know I try
As much as I can to be
The woman you want
And I know that it's you
I'm trying for

Days without you are long
And they're too many
I stare out the window
Wishing you were outside
Waiting to join me

So it's all emotional for me
Every moment I breathe
So I'm sorry if I cry
And overreact

But it's all just so very emotional
And in the end
No matter what emotion I feel
I know I love you.

I'm weird
When I sleep
I leave my TV on
Because I fear the creaks
In the night
And I fear the dark
Because I sense there are
Always monsters
Lurking in it
I get deja vu
And I remember most of my dreams
They always seem vivid
And so real that I wake up sometimes
Crying or afraid
Or just plain confused
Sometimes I can look at a person
And tell if they're "vibe"
Is good or bad
Sometimes I like to look at people
And make up a story about how they've
Been damaged
And sometimes
I think I'm just plain crazy
For all the little things I do
Or all the things I feel.

We're no longer the people we use to be
We have to move on
And leave those shadows
In our past
Sure stories are fun to tell
But they make you long
For what you no longer can have
They make you wish things
You don't really mean to wish
Don't get stuck in the past
Because life won't wait for you.

Sometimes this corrupt world
Makes me feel silly
For loving words
While they gallivant off
Into the world
Doing whatever they do
I write my words
Heart aching with every word
For I am released
And they give me a wide eyed look
When I say I love reading
And that I can finish a book
In a matter of hours
But I don't care
Because to me
Words can be beautiful
Words can set you free
Whether your writing or read
Words are just wonderful.

We've known each other
For nearly six years
And we have been together
Nearly two
And I find it's completely
Normal to draw a blank
When it comes to words
You see we're not average
Nor below or above
Just different
And in that difference
Silence may come
But no need to fear
For our *****
And randomness
Always helps soothe things
And so I find it's completely normal
To text you two hours later after
Going silent to tell you
About a chocolate heart
And I find it completely normal
That you made all the aching
Go away
For with you my heart
Is always at its best
Even if our minds get a little lost

In our time apart
I only notice
Our insanity
And how it grows
With everyday apart
And the only thing
Anchoring us down
In sanity
Is that visit
Every few weeks
That sparks magic
In my soul
And brings light
Back into my life
For when all falls apart
You can always find comfort
In the arms of the one you love.

We are stronger
Than any obstacle
We have been through
So much and here we are
Still fighting
For something
SO WORTH fighting for
Here we are
Battling every day
For our love
To rejoin
Hands
And to once again
Meet at the lips
And slip into bliss
Here we are
Aching for each other
Heart, body, mind and soul
A love unlike any other
Surpassing the teenage years
And entering us into adulthood
For together our dreams
Become real.

Distance
Aching heart
Pleading lips
Untouched hips
Begging to just be held
In those sweet arms
I envy those who get
To see those eyes
And my favorite scar
The butterflies
Came back to me one night
And have since been fluttering
Trying to be freed
They too wish for you back
To calm their impatience
I whisper each night
To assure that I never lose faith
Because it's all I have without you
Faith to see you
That our love will once again
CLASH
With ecstacy and joy
To simply be reunited
In your arms
With those lips
Would surely cure all and any
Of my ailments.

Your words
Sprinkled sweetly
In my ear
A symphony
Only my blessed ears
Can hear
So beautiful
So absolute
Infinitely
Together
Dreams
Coming true
Life finally worth while
As long as I am yours.

It aches
To know
That in this
Difficult time apart
I cannot suceed
In making you happy
I know you wish you were here
And oh how I wish
That you were too
But in this time apart
I hope you feel my love
I hope that you see
Every laugh and smile as
My attempt to be happy
To prove my love and
Deep affection
My sweet love
I hope that one day
You'll see the world
A little brighter
I wish being yours
Made it so
But you dream
Of happiness
In each others arms
And until that day
Know that I love you
And that you will always
Be my sunshine
My star
In every night sky
You are my forever
And that
Will never change.

The very word
Strikes me to my core
So many definitions
Of what makes a person
Beautiful
And yet
When you look at me
You need not think
Only speak the word
And that's how I feel loved
On darker days
With that word
That makes me feel special
And happy
With a simple word
That contains as many
Syllables as my first name
You wrap me into your arms
And complete me with your love
And I actually believe you
When you say it
Because that sparkle
In those sweet eyes
Tell me
You truly believe I am.

I'm ashamed to say
That when I dream
And on the rare
Occasion
That I see
My dream self
I see what I wish to be
Thin and beautiful
Living up to the worlds standards
It sickens me
Because that person will never be me
I don't want to want to be her
And yet in dreams
I tend to become her anyway.

I'm losing in this war
You see each day I realize
My best friend
Is becoming
My enemies
Best friend
And less mine
And each day
I realize
That the next day
I'll be sitting all alone.

I'm ashamed to say
My words,
They're running
Dry
And it seems
I'm no longer
Poetic
So I wonder
What will happen
To my emotions now.

Its like the war never ends
We fight and fight
Make things alright
and yet we hurt
And are wounded
When does the war end
I just want it to end.

As always I am
Healed with passion
With love
With an undeniable
Connection between our souls
So that in the end
Everything
Is better than okay
And we can live out
Our lives
Together
Just as we planned.

I wanna wrap you in my arms
And tell you everything will be okay
But sometimes I realize
I can't always get what I want
And while your away
I think of why this happened
And I think its God asking us
To fight just a little more
To prove that even in distance
Our love can survive
I think He wants us to try
And never give up
I think He loves us
And that's why Hes doing this
To help us see that even apart
We're fighting to be together
He wants us to appreciate what we have now
So we'll appreciate all we'll achieve even more
I have faith things will work out
Because He gives me faith
Because you give me faith
Because no matter what
I love you
And this battle is just another step
To the wonderful life in store for us
He didn't bring us together to break us apart
But instead to make us stronger together
Don't give up yet baby
For all will be okay
Our love will fight on
So baby smile because what we have
Not for what we don't
Give thanks we have this instead of nothing
Smile with me knowing that
As long as we never give up
All our dreams are possible.

Your smile
It helps my heart
Beat
And somehow
Your hapiness
Makes breathing
easier.

I love how your always warm
And how you love the winter
I love cuddling into your chest
And playing with the tiny hairs
I love stroking your beard
And running my hand through your hair
I love kiss your lips
And I love when you
Look me in the eyes
I love when you make funny faces
I love your eyes in the sun
Because they shimmer beautifully
And I love the way you hold my hand
I love the way you cover up with blankets
And cover me up too
I love how you let me poke your freckles
I love when you kiss my neck
And tell me you love me
I love it when you smile
And show your teeth
I love when your protective
And even when you get jealous for no reason
I love you
For everything that you are and aren't
And I will love you forever
You and I are soul-mates
And I will always be yours.

Tears swelled in my eyes
And pain mounted in my chest
As my lips begged for hope
And what I needed more than anything
Was a sweet and passionate kiss
And so I lean over to you
And kiss you
We get lost in it
You try to pull away
But I pull you closer
Never letting lips part
Because I cannot let you go
For I am healing
And suddenly we are submerged
In lashing tongues
And the sweet passion of young love
And there's no telling what
Wonderful place that can take us to.

I miss writing
Words that were worth reading
This distance
It's killing inspiration
I miss you
More than I miss
Being praised on poems
I miss you more
Than letting words flow
I miss you when even these words
Somehow come wrong.

Someone always seems
To ask me
How do I know everything
Will happen the way I hope?

And I simply respond
**Because when he loses faith
And when nothing seems right
I look to the sky
And I whisper my dreams
And the faith rushes back into me
I'm suddenly reassured
That everything will go the way I hope
And everyday I awake with faith in my heart
For I know with faith and determination
I can succeed.

Everyday
You comfort me
With words

You tell me
You love me
You call me your wife
And suddenly
I know

Everything will be okay
Because together
We'll succeed
One day
We'll get hitched
And have a baby
We'll all live happily
And the love will never die
Because that's just how it is with us
Because no matter how
Bad it seems
The sun always shines again
And we survive
We are warriors
Fighting for a cause worth while
Fighting for each other.

I cuddle into my pillow
Whenever we're on the phone
Imagining it was your chest.

I like to talk to the air
When I walk home alone
Imagining you were there.

When it snowed
I thought of you and I smiled
Imagining all the good times in precipitation.

I miss you
But I'm thankful
That your mine.

Now and Always

And one day I won't have
To imagine
Or dream
Because it'll all come true.

Parents can be so crazy**

Mommy have you met daddy
Who has never loved his little girl
Daddy have you met mommy
Who cherished her as a child
Mommy have you met daddy
Who raised his sons and left behind his daughter
Daddy have you met mommy
Who took in others and loved them too
Mommy have you met daddy
Who once gave his first born a hug
Daddy have you met mommy
Who insulted her daughter to the point she has no pride
Mommy have you met daddy
Who called his daughter a ***** with no remorse
Daddy have you met mommy
Who kept her against others advice
Mommy have you met daddy
Who steals and cheats
Daddy have you met mommy
Who is sometimes sad
Mommy have you met daddy
Who is best at disappointing his daughter.