i like to pretend
that i am strong
that i know how to handle sadness
but i really don't.
i am so lost.

i have just bloomed
and i am already wilting away

you liked to fix things
so i broke myself for you

do not
leave me alone here
no matter how much
i tell you to go

i laugh at the irony
that love broke my heart.

we are all
a little broken
and there will be
moments in life
that make all the
heartache
worth having,
because pain
and suffering
make the outcome
that much more
of an accomplishment

sometimes i wonder
if we were made with different circumstances
would we be together

the silence between us
is so loud
it's almost deafening

sometimes i wish you were here to hurt me again

it always feels
like the
end of the world
when you look
away from me
to look over
at her.

we are drifting side by side
when we used to glide
i can see it clearly
i am just too tired
to acknowledge it

i am scared of not being important to you.

i fear loving half of you and half of vast nothingness

i fear i am aiming towards nothing

you know more about me than i think i do and you can destroy me with that.

you forgot to bury me after you killed me
and for that my heart will not rest

how is it that
all you have to do is look at me
with those brown eyes
and smile
with those dimples
and i just fall back
into your trap
only to be left alone again

i am not quite ready to say goodbye
to the things that i've known
it is scary to think that one day
i will be on my own

i really just want you
to be proud of me.

i hope that you grasp those stars
you spent so long reaching for
and i hope
you find what you are looking for
i love you
i miss you,
i'm giving my best.

your touch set me on fire
but i realized too late
that i was engulfed in flames -
burning alive
and you were not there
to extinguish me

you are so beautiful
i hate
how the world
destroys you

i can't explain it
and i don't know if
it's just because i can't understand it
or if it's just one of those things
that exists in this universe
that is too complex
and too extraordinary
for the mind to comprehend

you make the nastiest things sound so pretty

you are one person out of over 7 billion
and can take one second out of the day
to give the most subtle touch
or say one simple sentence
and these minuscule fragments
can change the entire world around me

i never knew
it was possible
for someone to
hold the power
to make me feel
my highest
and my lowest
at the flick of a wrist.

i see the stretch of red feathers
as you soar overhead
beautiful and bold
with sharp contrast against
the bright blue skies
and i never feel more at home
because i know you will always be with me

adventure forever continues
adventure forever awaits
but sometimes i want to take a break
and go back to where i came from
to where it all started

i am pulled
with your current
and every time
i think i am close to shore
you lure me back in
and my feet stop touching
the ground once again.

i said i don't know if i believe in soulmates
and you told me that you believed in me and you.

isn't it so special
when someone
let's you see
the beautiful mess
that is going on
inside of their mind

we won't admit it
but we are both stuck
in this substitution of happiness
that we are too scared to let go
because at least we are stuck together

i have been dragging along
through these months
but your lips taste like
everything i have been missing out on

we were like
two doors
on opposite sides of the hall
with a band
connected to each handle
so every time i pulled
you closed
and every time you pulled
i closed
but one day
the band snapped
and our doors were wide open
vulnerable but accepting
and anxious but excited
we saw inside
the deepest parts
that no one had visited before
but i woke up today
and looked
to see
that you'd tied the band
back on both handles
and oh how that hurts
so terribly

we both found each other
without really looking
but the tragedy of it is
we were both the right people
at the wrong time
if only
we had stumbled across each other
a little bit sooner