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Kaitlin Evers Dec 2018
Am I doin' alright
Am I doin' okay
Feels like I'm fallin' away
Can't trust myself; don't know what to say
Am I feelin' this way
Because I know what others say
Or because I know that I've strayed from your way
I don't care what others say
Just wanna be okay
Don't wanna stray from your way
Just tell me:
Am I okay?
Am I doin' alright
Don't know why I'm feelin' contrite
Guilted by others
Or knowin' they're right
Kaitlin Evers Nov 2018
Never more than I can bear
It's what you promised me
A wrenching family affair
Obsessed with his authority,
trying to control me,
memories that hold me,
it's almost more than I can bear
He doesn't even care
It tears, it breaks, it falls apart
And this is just the start
Kaitlin Evers Nov 2018
God, piece me back together
Will it ever not hurt?
Dearest blindfold, hide me
From the truth once again
Believing the lie
Was my happiest path
Is the truth really worth it
When all it gains is pain?
Kaitlin Evers Nov 2018
Surpressed and hidden from my sight
God I need your voice and light
For distant memories and forgotten blight
I've been weak and shut them from sight
Easier for me to hide
And pretend, in no realm, do they abide
Kept secret so long it's hard to confide
I fear they'll excuse my faulter's side
Ignore my plight
I'll feel contrite
Convinced I've shown a twisted light
But NO! My words are not twisted
Though my eyes they have misted
My heart is a knot
The truth is rot
They may hide their face but I will not
I ache to stand and say, at least that I have fought
Kaitlin Evers Oct 2018
Lost. Where am I? Cold earth beneath me; bleak, vast, dripping darkness surrounding me. Alone, and lying at the bottom of the Devil's Kettle. I search inside of myself. I am empty. No mettle to stir, nothing inside myself to waken me from this darkness. Drip, drip, goes the saddening darkness enshrouding me. Once I had zeal. It is hard to imagine now. I am a shell, or not at all myself. There is no help. None who know of the black hole in which I lie. And if they did, how could one reach down a hand to lift me up? God! God! God! The One who blessed me with strength, the One who took my strength. Cast me not headlong; lift me up with your victorious right hand. God! God! God! Day upon day I cry out. Day upon day the earth beneath me lifts up.  Pain, pain, it washes away, weighted chains are falling loose, He elevates my sunken earth. Until the hole I lie in is no longer a hole, but is level earth in the light of day. Birds twitter, flowers are in bloom, the sun is shining through the trees. My world completely changed; and better than last I was here. Life and new song are inside of me. God! God! God! Out of the miry bog you have rescued me and strengthened me anew. Praise! Praise! Praise! Blessed be your name!
Kaitlin Evers Aug 2018
Some things the soul does not share
In writings or with friend
Thought and emotion so bare
Held back from even the closest of kin
Kept secret for the soul itself
Sub rosa, collecting dust on a shelf
Kaitlin Evers Jul 2018
You draw me gently near  
Letting me know I have nothing to fear
Your touch soothing as a breeze
You've set my beating heart at ease

But before I was so close to you
A bridge had to be set
To link our great divide
Yes it was you
Who paid my debt
And sent Your Son who died

It was Him they did seize
When it should've been me
Twasn't but ordinary fees
But still You thought it worth your Son to save humanity
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