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It’s not new to see me,
Pushing this boulder of a mother up a hill.
Her tears making the ground slip.
But today I stop,
Look at the “child”
And I let it fall like one.
Like it deserves,
Weather or not you carry yours.
You believe that I can,
You want me to think,
You hate to see me waste,
You can’t possibly feel like,
You don’t speak to me like that,
You don’t get a say,
You don’t get to abuse me and say I can do nothing.
Good has always been doing what is right,
Always for the greater good.
Evil has always been doing wrong,
Doing things for yourself.
There’s a balance there hardly talked about.
I remember you fondly,
With a warm light,
And the calmest of colds,
In the worst of times of my life.

I will never forget you,
I will never know your name,
In a way,
I will always love you.
I want you and I don't.

No matter how I wrack my brain,
I do not understand you.

I control you and I don't.

I can never understand why,
But I will always be the most curious.

I get you and I don't.
I have thought about you,
With heartbreak and smiles.

While
I do
Want you,

I know
I'm in
Denial.

You can not be my child,
I won't damage a youth,
That could make itself,
A greater truth.
Ah,
My beloved,
A name from god knows when.

I know you are my heartbreak,
And I know you are my truth.

If anyone’s ever abused me,
I know it has been you.
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